The Message in the Status Update
by seriouscaseofthegayface
Summary: Your favourite Bones episodes, one Facebook status update at a time. No one's private life is safe.
1. The Mastodon in the Room

**A/N: Hi everyone! Well, I was reading DJ-DizzyD's fabulous story, 'Facebook Official: The Glee Relationships' (seriously, it's brilliant – check it out!), and thought that it would be fun to use the same premise with Bones instead! All credit goes to her, and her amazing idea, this story is simply a little homage to her amazing fic! **

**I won't be doing all the Bones episodes... but I will take suggestions as to which ones you'd like me to do, so let me know :D **

**This is Mastodon in the Room – hope you all enjoy it! xD**

**

* * *

**

**Daisy Wick **is coming home from Maluku today! Yay! ! ! ! ! ! !

(**Daisy Wick **and **Caroline Julian **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **is Dr Brennan coming too, or have you squealed her to death with your excessive punctuation?

(**24** friends like this)

**Daisy Wick** You know, Dr Hodgins, you could choose to be nice! But you don't!

**Lance Sweets** Wait... you're coming home?

**Daisy Wick **Yup! I can't wait to see you again, BunBun!

**Lance Sweets **Daisy, please don't call me that...

**Daisy Wick **But it's cute! :D

**Lance Sweets **Sigh...

**Jack Hodgins ***makes 'whipped' noises*

(**Jack Hodgins **and **Angela Montenegro **like this)

**Lance Sweets **Shut up.

* * *

**Seeley Booth **Rough day. Coming home from Afghanistan.

(**Caroline Julian **likes this)

**Caroline Julian** Don't fret, cherie. Things will be just peachy soon enough :)

**Seeley Booth** Caroline... don't use emoticons. It's creepy when you do it.

(**15 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **You're coming home too?

**Camille Saroyan **Oh, thank God. We need to talk when you get here.

**Jack Hodgins ***makes 'whipped' noises*

(**27 **friends like this)

**Camille Saroyan **I don't know what you're laughing about, Hodgins. We also need to talk when you get home.

**Jack Hodgins **Yes ma'am.

**Lance Sweets **Who's whipped now?

(**12 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **Still you.

**Jack Hodgins **BunBun.

(**30 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **:(

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **Au revior, Paris! À la prochaine fois...

(**Jack Hodgins **and **Angela Montenegro **like this)

**Angela Montenegro **You're so cute when you speak French ;)

**Jack Hodgins** You're still the cutest, mon amour :)

**Angela Montenegro **;)

**Jack Hodgins **;D

**Clark Edison ***gags*

(**50** friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **Now you guys are coming home too? No one tells me anything!

* * *

**Lance Sweets** is reinstated at the FBI

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **Yay! ! ! !

**Caroline Julian **Glad to hear you're behaving like a big boy once more.

(**Seeley Booth **and **Daisy Wick **like this)

**Daisy Wick **A very big boy ;) ;) ;) ;)

**Lance Sweets **Daisy! :O

**Angela Montenegro **TMI!

**Clark Edison ***gags*

(**Angela Montenegro **and **21 **other friends like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth, Angela Montenegro **and **23 **other friends are now friends with **Temperance Brennan**

**Lance Sweets **You got Facebook?

**Temperance Brennan** Daisy made it for me. I still don't know what any of this means.

(**5 **friends like this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **Nice to be back in DC. Saw **Seeley Booth** again today.

(**107 **friends like this)

**Angela Montenegro **Details?

**Daisy Wick **Less than sign, numeral three! ! !

**Lance Sweets **This sounds interesting.

**Seeley Booth **Guys, nothing happened...

**Angela Montenegro **Suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuure ;)

(**34 **friends like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth** is in a relationship with **Hannah Burley **

(**Seeley Booth **and **Temperance Brennan **like this)

**Lance Sweets **Dislike.

**Camille Saroyan **Seconded.

**Daisy Wick **:( :( :( ! ! !

* * *

**Wendell Bray **is out of the garage and back at the Jeff :D

(**Vincent Nigel-Murray **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **Dude, it's not the Jeff anymore. It's a filthy, tiled, subway station bathroom with an operating table.

**Wendell Bray **It's not that bad!

**Angela Montenegro **It smells like tiger urine in there.

**Wendell Bray **O_O

**Wendell Bray **I don't even want to know how you know that.

(**10** friends like this)

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Lance Sweets**: I'm home! ! ! Want to meet up? ? :)

**Lance Sweets **Sure, Founding Fathers? 9.30?

**Daisy Wick **I'll be there! ! ! It's a date! ! :D

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **... No it's not...

* * *

**Lance Sweets **and **Daisy Wick **are in a relationship, and it's complicated.

(**Temperance Brennan **likes this)

**Temperance Brennan** Like the Ramberg-Osgood relationship?

**Lance Sweets **No, Dr Brennan.

**Angela Montenegro **I'll PM you, sweetie.

**Daisy Wick **:( :( ! ! ! Are you sure we're not engaged? ?

**Lance Sweets **Daisy...

**Daisy Wick **I said I was sorry! ! ! :( :( :(

**Lance Sweets **Sad emoticons will have no impact on me, Daisy.

**Daisy Wick **I still less than three you, BunBun! ! !

**Lance Sweets **Please stop calling me that.

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

* * *

**Camille Saroyan **I'd forgotten what it was like working with other professionals...

(**Temperance Brennan **and **Jack Hodgins **like this)

**Jack Hodgins **We love you too, Cam :)

**Camille Saroyan **Stay off Facebook at work, Hodgins.

**Lance Sweets **Whipped!

**Jack Hodgins **Whatever you say, BunBun.

(**30** friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **I hate you.

* * *

**Seeley Booth **to **Lance Sweets**: Move on.

**Lance Sweets** But...

**Seeley Booth **Give yourself a chance to be happy. Move on.

**Daisy Wick **Dislike! ! ! ! :( :(

**Caroline Julian **Now, that's awkward.

(**54 **friends like this)

* * *

**Angela Montenegro **has had a good day :D

(**Temperance Brennan** likes this)

**Temperance Brennan **I am very happy to be your sister, Ange.

**Temperance Brennan **Metaphorically speaking.

**Temperance Brennan **We're not actually related.

(**4 **people like this)

**Angela Montenegro **They know, sweetie.

**Jack Hodgins **What's going on, Angie?

**Angela Montenegro **Meet me for lunch, I have something to tell you :)

**Jack Hodgins **?

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **is staying in DC.

(**17 **friends like this)

**Wendell Bray **Awesome :)

**Daisy Wick **Yay! ! ! ! !

**Camille Saroyan **Some people don't realise that I'm the one that gives pay rises.

(**Jack Hodgins **and **6 **friends like this)

**Angela Montenegro **I knew it! :D

**Clark Edison **I'll get the next flight from Chicago.

**Arastoo Vaziri **Switching majors :)

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **I get released from rehabilitation next week. Did you know that Lindsay Lohan has, to date, been in rehab five times?

**Colin Fisher **I suppose I'll come back to work. Seems pretty meaningless, though.

**Seeley Booth **Welcome back, Bones.

(**67 **friends like this)

**Temperance Brennan **I told you that I was the linchpin.

**Seeley Booth **Sigh...

* * *

**Daisy Wick **and **Lance Sweets **are no longer engaged

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **You're mean, Agent Booth! ! :( :(

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **:( :( :(

* * *

**Daisy Wick **and **Lance Sweets **are just friends

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **This doesn't work for me.

**Jack Hodgins **Aww :(

**Lance Sweets **Yes, no more BunBun.

**Jack Hodgins **Maybe not from Miss Talks-a-Lot, but you're still getting it from me, BunBun.

(**77 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **Life sucks.

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Lance Sweets**: Your beard is seriously really cute, baby.

**Lance Sweets **Thanks. I liked that blouse you wore today.

**Daisy Wick **I miss you :(

**Lance Sweets **I miss you, too.

**Daisy Wick **I miss your smile.

**Lance Sweets **I miss your mouth.

**Daisy Wick **... What?

**Lance Sweets **Uh... nothing.

**Daisy Wick **:D :D :D! !

* * *

**Daisy Wick **and **Lance Sweets **are in a *secret* open relationship

**(Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **Daisy, it's not much of a secret if you put it on Facebook...

**Daisy Wick **Oops, my bad! Sorry, baby! ! Forgivesies? ? ;)

**Lance Sweets **Fine. Just because you're cute :)

**Daisy Wick **:D X3 !

**Lance Sweets **:) X3

**Lance Sweets **Don't even say ANYTHING, Hodgins!

**Jack Hodgins **Damn, that was fast!

(**Daisy Wick **and **2 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **You have no idea! ;) ;)

**Angela Montenegro **TMI :O

**Clark Edison ***gags*

(**52 **friends like this)

* * *

**Camille Saroyan **Solved the case! My job has been saved - thanks everyone!

**Wendell Bray **No prob! :)

**Temperance Brennan **You're welcome. As the linchpin, I was clearly invaluable to the process.

(**Temperance Brennan **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **Least we could do, Cam.

**Jack Hodgins **...When do I get paid?

**Camille Saroyan **Angela, please slap him for me.

**Angela Montenegro **Done ;)

**Jack Hodgins **Ow!

(**Camille Saroyan**, **Seeley Booth** and **13** other friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **No one appreciates my humour :(

(**Angela Montenegro **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **:(

* * *

**Angela Montenegro **can't wait to tell **Jack Hodgins **her news!

**Lance Sweets **What news?

**Angela Montenegro **;)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **is happy! :D :D :D :D

**Camille Saroyan **Has Daisy infected you, too?

(**31 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **Hey! D: D:

**Lance Sweets **That makes two of us :)

**Daisy Wick **Squee! ! ! :)

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Wendell Bray **Home come you're so happy, dude?

**Jack Hodgins **It's a secret! :D

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **to **Angela Montenegro**: I love you :D :D :D

**Angela Montenegro **Sap.

**Angela Montenegro **But I love you too.

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **:D :D :D :D :D

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **has figured out who the linchpin is.

**Seeley Booth **For the final time, it's me!

**Temperance Brennan **No, it's not.

**Jack Hodgins **It's me and Angie!

**Temperance Brennan **You're incorrect, Dr Hodgins.

**Daisy Wick **Is it me? ? :D :D

**Jack Hodgins **BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

(**82 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **I'm going to tell Lance! ! !

**Jack Hodgins **Is he going to hit me with a lightsaber?

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Seeley Booth ***high fives*

**Jack Hodgins ***high fives back*

**Daisy Wick **You're both just jealous! ! :( :(

**Jack Hodgins **BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! ... Oh, wait, you're serious? BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

(**12 **friends like this)

* * *

**Camille Saroyan **Does anyone know how to get a mastodon out of a room?

**Caroline Julian **Not my problem.

**Jack Hodgins **BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

**Camille Saroyan **If you don't stop laughing soon, Hodgins, you'll be the one carrying said mastodon.

**Jack Hodgins **Sorry, Cam.

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **At least I'm not called 'BunBun'.

**Lance Sweets **Go away.

**Daisy Wick **Ignore him, BunBun! He's just being mean! Love you! ! ! :D :D

**Lance Sweets **:D

**Arastoo Vaziri** ...Mastodon? I don't get it.

**Wendell Bray **Had to be there.

(**8 **friends like this)

* * *

**Caroline Julian **Well, I think this all wrapped up quite nicely.

**Seeley Booth** You da bomb, Caroline!

(**3 **friends like this)

**Temperance Brennan **... I still don't know what that means.

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **We love you, Caroline!

**Angela Montenegro **Seconded!

**Lance Sweets **Group hug? :)

**Camille Saroyan ***hug*

**Jack Hodgins ***hug* :D

**Angela Montenegro ***hug* :D

**Seeley Booth **... *hug* :)

**Temperance Brennan **... I don't get it.

(**6 **people like this)

**Caroline Julian **Yeah, yeah. Whatever.

* * *

**A/N: And that's it, folks! I hope you liked it – please don't hesitate to leave a review, it would truly make my day! :D**

**Peace,**

**Ellie :)**


	2. The Couple in the Cave

**A/N: Now, you shouldn't be expecting daily updates of this – especially not after I go back to school and get crazily busy once more! But this is so addicting to write, so here's a treat for you :D All credit goes to DJ-DizzyD, because she is amazing and her idea for 'Facebook Official: The Glee Relationships' was incredible!**

**This is 6x02, The Couple in the Cave – I hope you enjoy it! Please, please, leave a review to brighten up my day :D**

**Peace,  
-Ellie :)**

**

* * *

**

**Seeley Booth **misses Hannah :(

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

**Daisy Wick **Not nice when someone likes your misery, is it, Agent Booth? ?

**Seeley Booth **Daisy... just leave.

**Daisy Wick **Fine! But I'm leaving of my own volition! ! ! Not because you told me to! ! !

**Seeley Booth ***facepalm*

**Hannah Burley **I miss you too, Seeley :(

**Seeley Booth **:(

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **Daisy, I will shoot you - Sweets or no Sweets.

**Daisy Wick **meep! o.o

* * *

**Lance Sweets **to **Seeley Booth**: Please don't threaten my... uh... my Daisy.

(**Daisy Wick** and **Jack Hodgins **like this)

**Seeley Booth **Did she tell you to say that?

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Seeley Booth** ... I knew it.

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **feels like she's never been away from **Seeley Booth**

(**Angela Montenegro **and **100 **friends like this)

**Angela Montenegro **You two belong together.

**Temperance Brennan **Professionally, you mean?

**Angela Montenegro **Yes. Of course that's what I meant...

**Caroline Julian **Mmhmm. And that's why you should always listen to Caroline.

(**6 **friends like this)

**Seeley Booth **We're back, baby :D

(**Temperance Brennan** likes this)

* * *

**Hannah Burley **is now friends with **Temperance Brennan**, **Angela Montenegro **and **22 **other friends.

**Seeley Booth **I can't believe you're here! :D

**Hannah Burley **;) I love you.

**Seeley Booth **I love you too :D

**Clark Edison ***gags*

**Jack Hodgins **Get a room!

(**46 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick** Are you a really vigourous, burly woman like your last name dictates? ?

**Seeley Booth ** SWEETS!

**Lance Sweets **Sorry, sorry! Daisy... no. I'll PM you.

* * *

**Clark Edison **All I want is to work in a purely professional environment.

**Jack Hodgins **That's not what you said this morning ;)

**Clark Edison **Dr Hodgins, don't you even dare -

**Jack Hodgins **And I quote, "it's obvious you and Agent Booth were attracted to each other. I mean, a blind man can see that. I just don't understand why you didn't rip each other's clothes off and get all butt naked -"

(**93 **friends like this)

**Clark Edison** ... How did you even remember that?

**Jack Hodgins **Got the tape from the security guys. I'm setting this baby as my ringtone ;)

**Clark Edison **Dr Hodgins, I am going to kill you.

**Jack Hodgins **Where, at work? Because I don't think that'd be very 'professional' behaviour.

**Jack Hodgins **OH SNAP.

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Clark Edison **I'm telling Dr Saroyan!

**Jack Hodgins **Crap, no! I'm sorry! Don't tell her!

(**10 **friends like this)

* * *

**Camille Saroyan** to **Jack Hodgins**: Stop terrorising the interns.

**Jack Hodgins **But it's so fun!

**Camille Saroyan **I don't care if it's fun, Dr Hodgins. I'm pretty sure you're the reason Vincent Nigel-Murray is still in rehab.

**Jack Hodgins **You're no fun.

**Camille Saroyan **Excuse me?

**Jack Hodgins **... Nothing.

**Camille Saroyan **That's what I thought you said.

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **to **Angela Montenegro**: How are you feeling? :D

**Angela Montenegro **Fine ;)

**Jack Hodgins **Are you sure? Do you need me to get you anything? Food? Water? Plane tickets back to Paris?

**Lance Sweets **I thought you guys were staying! Why are you going back to Paris? And what's up with Angela?

**Jack Hodgins** Facebook stalk much?

**Lance Sweets **What? No!

**Jack Hodgins **Don't try and deny it, creeper.

**Lance Sweets **I'm not a creeper!

**Jack Hodgins **Sure you're not. And I'm not an incredible studmuffin.

(**Angela Montenegro **likes this)

**Angela Montenegro **;)

**Lance Sweets **Sigh...

* * *

**Lance Sweets **and **Daisy Wick **are ridin' that wave

(**Daisy Wick **and **5** friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **:D :D :D :D :D :D! ! !

**Seeley Booth **Don't forget the SPF.

(**32 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **We won't... ;) ;) ;) ;)

**Jack Hodgins **Aw, BunBun and the Blabbermouth!

**Lance Sweets **:(

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Temperance Brennan **Is that a movie?

**Angela Montenegro **... No, sweetie. Just no.

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **to **Angela Montenegro**: I love you.

**Angela Montenegro **I saw you drooling over her, Hodgins.

**Jack Hodgins **What? Hannah? No, no! Of course not. You're my one and only!

**Angela Montenegro **Uh huh.

**Jack Hodgins **I worship you. You're beautiful. Amazing. Intelligent. Did I mention beautiful?

**Angela Montenegro **I'll forgive you. Just because you're cute.

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **:D

**Seeley Booth **Wait, what about Hannah?

**Jack Hodgins **Nothing! Nothing about Hannah.

**Seeley Booth **That's it, Hodgins. I'm coming over to the Jeffersonian now. And I'm bringing my gun.

**Jack Hodgins **Oh crap! D:

**Seeley Booth **I'd run if I were you.

(**Camille Saroyan**, **Clark Edison **and **20 **other friends like this)

* * *

**Lance Sweets **has a shrinky mojo, apparently.

**Daisy Wick **There's nothing shrinky about YOUR mojo! ;) ;) ;)

**Angela Montenegro **TMI! D:

**Clark Edison ***gags*

(**60 **friends like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **is happy :)

**Hannah Burley **I'm happy too!

**Seeley Booth **:)

**Colin Fisher **... What's that like?

**Hannah Burley **Um...?

**Seeley Booth **Crawl back into your black hole, Eeyore.

(**Camille Saroyan **likes this)

**Colin Fisher **Ouch. That hurt.

**Seeley Booth **That's what you get for killing the mood.

**Hannah Burley **I'll swing by your office, cheer you up :)

**Seeley Booth **Okay :)

**Clark Edison ***gags*

**Angela Montenegro **You're making me nauseous, and I just got back from my honeymoon.

(**Jack Hodgins **and **57 **friends like this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **is going for lunch with **Seeley Booth** and **Hannah Burley**.

**Camille Saroyan **Awkward.

**Jack Hodgins **Awkward.

**Angela Montenegro **Very awkward.

(**36 **friends like this)

**Temperance Brennan **... I don't know what you're talking about.

**Seeley Booth **Yeah, guys. We're all totally cool with it.

**Caroline Julian ***facepalm*

**Lance Sweets **... You all need some serious therapy.

(**102 **friends like this)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **to **Hannah Burley**: I just wanted to say that I am a huge fan!

**Hannah Burley **Thanks, that's very sweet of you.

**Jack Hodgins **Seriously - the work you do is amazing!

**Hannah Burley **I like to think so...

**Jack Hodgins **Really, it is! Would you like to go for coffee sometime? Maybe discuss the hypocrisy of today's media when it comes to international foreign policy?

**Seeley Booth **I warned you before, Hodgins. Now you're getting a bullet in the brain.

**Jack Hodgins **CRAP!

* * *

**Angela Montenegro **is worried about **Jack Hodgins**. He said something about running to Quebec?

**Seeley Booth **Not anymore, he's not.

**Angela Montenegro **I don't even want to know.

(**Seeley Booth **and **17 **friends like this)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **is back. And sorry. Never let **Seeley Booth** get mad at you, people.

(**Seeley Booth** likes this)

**Camille Saroyan **Now that you're acting maturely again... Get back to work, lovely assistant.

**Lance Sweets ***snort* Lovely assistant?

**Jack Hodgins **The emphasis is on the 'lovely', BunBun. And everyone knows I'm lovelier than you.

**Jack Hodgins **What's that? Oh, someone got SERVED.

(**Jack Hodgins **and **3 **friends like this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **can't believe **Camille Saroyan **thought that **Hannah Burley** could impact my work life - ludicrous.

**Hannah Burley **Really? She said that?

**Camille Saroyan **What? I didn't... I mean... I don't...! Dr Brennan! I need to see you in my office.

**Angela Montenegro **Oh, sweetie. Don't put these things on Facebook.

**Temperance Brennan **Why not, Ange?

**Angela Montenegro **Because everyone can see this!

**Temperance Brennan **... I don't understand what you're saying.

**Angela Montenegro **Sigh... never mind.

* * *

**Clark Edison **can't stop sneezing.

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **BAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

**Daisy Wick **Do you have to stay home sick? ? Because I'll assist Dr Brennan! ! ! :D

**Wendell Bray **Yeah, I'll fill in for you.

**Arastoo Vaziri **I'd be happy to help out!

**Colin Fisher **... I wouldn't be happy about it, but I'll help anyway.

**Seeley Booth **Bones, your squinterns are vultures.

(**5 **friends like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **to **Hannah Burley**: You looked beautiful tonight :)

(**Hannah Burley **likes this)

**Hannah Burley **You looked... okay... I guess ;)

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Angela Montenegro **I thought you and Brennan went for a post-case drink?

**Seeley Booth **Oh, we did. And then Hannah and I went to get some dinner.

**Jack Hodgins **So not cool.

**Seeley Booth ***takes out gun*

**Jack Hodgins ***runs to Quebec*

**Daisy Wick **Taking out your gun? ? I'd like to see that! ! ;) ;) ;) Teehee! !

**Camille Saroyan **Oh my God.

**Jack Hodgins **She did not just say that.

**Lance Sweets **DAISY :O

**Angela Montenegro **Sweets, I'd take your girlfriend and leave the country.

**Seeley Booth **You are all dead.

* * *

**A/N: Like my insanity? Don't forget to review! It would make me smile like this - :DDDDD  
Peace, **

**-Ellie :)**


	3. The Maggots in the Meathead

**A/N: Here I am again! YAY! :) Sorry for the delay in getting this chapter up – I'll be trying my best, but school is getting in the way a lot. Grr! Anyway, I hope you enjoy this update (sorry for crazy!Hodgins in advance... he should never be given a computer)!  
Maggots in the Meathead, yo.**

**

* * *

**

**Seeley Booth** is going to the beach.

**Lance Sweets **At 3 am?

**Seeley Booth **Got a case. What are you doing on Facebook at this hour, anyway?

**Lance Sweets **Um...

**Daisy Wick **He's at my place! ! ! ! ! ;) ;) ;)

**Seeley Booth **I regret asking that question...

**Angela Montenegro **You're going to the beach with Brennan?

(**6 **friends like this)

**Seeley Booth **I work with her, Angela... of course she's going. And you're up this early too?

**Jack Hodgins **Weeelllll...

**Seeley Booth **For the love of God, don't answer that.

(**Lance Sweets **and **4 **friends like this)

* * *

**Camille Saroyan **to **Jack Hodgins**: Lots of maggots on the victim. Must be your lucky day.

**Jack Hodgins **YAY!

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Angela Montenegro **It worries me how excited you are about that.

(**12** friends like this)

* * *

**Colin Fisher **is back at the soulless place called work. Trying to live joyously in every moment.

**Steve Thursfield **That's great! Happy for you, man.

**Colin Fisher** Thanks Steve. The case we're working on involves maggots that jump up and grab their butts in their mouths - thought of you.

**(Steve Thursfield **likes this)

**Steve Thursfield **Aw, shucks! Really? Thanks pal! :D

**Lance Sweets** I hear you've been doing a great job, Mr Fisher.

**Jack Hodgins **Yeah! Please don't kill yourself! :)

**Lance Sweets **... Subtle, Hodgins. Really subtle.

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **The maggots are jumping! Best day ever!

**Angela Montenegro **I worry about you.

(**42** friends like this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **is fascinated by this case, and able to draw knowledge from that compelling documentary series about the Jersey Shore.

(**28 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **Are you serious?

**Temperance Brennan** I am always serious, Dr Sweets.

**Lance Sweets **Of course. How stupid of me to even ask that question.

(**Angela Montenegro **likes this)

**Zack Addy **I saw that. It aired directly after that documentary about the bear whose thought processes were so advanced he was able to successfully drive a car.

**Jack Hodgins ** For the last time, dude - IT WAS A CARTOON!

(**71** friends like this)

**Zack Addy **I am certain you're incorrect.

**Temperance Brennan **I concur, vehemently.

**Angela Montenegro **Sigh... I'll PM both of you.

* * *

**Colin Fisher **Death is sad. Not happy.

**Jack Hodgins ***slow clap*

(**Seeley Booth **and **Hannah Burley **like this)

**Camille Saroyan **Dr Hodgins, I will take away the maggots and make you do paperwork.

**Jack Hodgins **No, no! I'm sorry, Fisher! Don't take the maggots away from me!

**Camille Saroyan **Better.

**Angela Montenegro **... Seriously, Jack. Worried. Maybe you should see Sweets about this?

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **:D

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **is excited to go and observe the Guido Tribe.

(**5 **friends like this)

**Wendell Bray **O_O Are you supposed to call them that?

**Lance Sweets **I'm pretty sure she's not.

**Clark Edison **Nuh-uh. Definitely not.

**Temperance Brennan **It is perfectly correct. I've studied the many intricacies of their rich culture.

(**3 **friends like this)

**Angela Montenegro **Please come back in one piece, sweetie.

**Seeley Booth **She'll be fine, Angela. ... And Bones, just try to be cool.

**Temperance Brennan **Of course. Cool. Yo. Yo. Sup.

* * *

**Seeley Booth **There are men's beauty products now?

**Daisy Wick **Yup! ! Lance wears them! ! ! :D

(**Jack Hodgins **and **23 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **No, I don't! Daisy! D:

**Daisy Wick **Aaw, I'm sorry! ! Forgive me, DoDo? ? :)

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **... DoDo? :D

**Lance Sweets **Crap.

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **...

(**86** friends like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **to **Hannah Burley**: Go ahead and move all your stuff in. See you for dinner. :)

**Seeley Booth **Oh, and Bones says hi.

**Hannah Burley **Will do! ... Um, hi Temperance!

**Temperance Brennan **Did you tell her I said, 'hi'?

**Angela Montenegro **He did, sweetie, it's right there.

**Temperance Brennan **Ah, I see.

(**27 **friends like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth ***facepalm*

**Lance Sweets **GTG TRNSLT TXTSPK. TTFN.

**Daisy Wick **U R A QT! ! ! !

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **U SURE? M I NT 2 M 2 H 6Y?

**Daisy Wick **NT 4 ME ;) ;)

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **;)

**Temperance Brennan **... I'm a genius, and I'm confused.

(**Seeley Booth **and **93 **friends like this)

* * *

**Hannah Burley **to **Temperance Brennan**: Thanks for the advice! Lucky to know someone who knows Seeley so well!

(**Temperance Brennan **and **Angela Montenegro **like this)

**Temperance Brennan **You're welcome, Hannah. I am... very happy for you both.

**Daisy Wick **LIES! ! ! ! ! !

**Angela Montenegro **Daisy... not now.

**Daisy Wick **But but but - I don't want my Semperance ship to be sunk! ! ! ! D: D:

**Jack Hodgins **Semperance?

(**112 **friends like this)

**Temperance Brennan **I don't know what that means.

(**Jack Hodgins **and **120 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **Daisy, remember what we talked about? Keeping certain things to yourself?

**Daisy Wick **Oh, of course! ! Sorry! ! Thanks, DoDo! ! ! :D :D

**Jack Hodgins **Yeah, thanks a mil, DoDo ;)

**Lance Sweets **Don't you have anything else to do?

**Jack Hodgins **Nope :)

**Lance Sweets ***headdesk*

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

* * *

**Camille Saroyan **to **Angela Montenegro**: I am so happy! :D :D :D

(**Angela Montenegro **likes this)

**Angela Montenegro **Me too! But shh! Keep it on the DL ;)

**Lance Sweets **Keep what on the DL?

**Wendell Bray **What has you guys so happy? :)

**Angela Montenegro **And the Facebook stalkers are revealed...

**Lance Sweets **Why does everyone keep calling me that? :(

(**Jack Hodgins **and **6** friends like this)

**Colin Fisher **Wow, I thought I was being chipper.

**Jack Hodgins **BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

**Camille Saroyan **Hodgins...

**Jack Hodgins **Sorry, sorry! Working. Now. I swear.

(**Camille Saroyan** likes this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan** is going creeping with Seeley Booth, yo.

(**49** friends like this)

**Angela Montenegro **Seriously?

**Daisy Wick **Like at Halloween? ? Can I come? ? :D

**Temperance Brennan **Miss Wick, you're supposed to be working on your dissertation, yo, yo, sup. And no, though your confusion is understandable of someone not versed in Guido ritual, creeping refers to going to a cheap nightclub and looking for potential mates, yo.

**Lance Sweets **O_O

(**30 **friends like this)

**Seeley Booth **She's serious.

**Lance Sweets **I told you to stop encouraging her to buy a TV...

(**14 **friends like this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **This case is so random, yo.

(**49 **friends like this)

**Wendell Bray **Dr Brennan, are you feeling all right? :/

**Temperance Brennan **Sup, Mr Bray. I feel perfectly fine, yo.

**Wendell Bray** Um...

**Angela Montenegro **Don't bother, Wendell. She's been like this all week - it's nothing to worry about. We hope.

(**15 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick ***is seeing her idol in a different light and doesn't know how she feels about this* ! ! ! ! :O :O

(**Jack Hodgins **and **6** friends like this)

**Temperance Brennan **... I don't know what y'all mean, yo.

**Jack Hodgins **Likewise.

(**11 **friends like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **to **Lance Sweets**: Nice work today with the whole text message jealousy map... thing.

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **THX AGNT B! IT WS FN! :)

**Seeley Booth **... You just ruined it.

(**Jack Hodgins **and **2 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **UNCLD 4!

**Jack Hodgins **Suck it up, DoDo. :P

**Lance Sweets **... 4Q

**Jack Hodgins **Huh?

**Seeley Booth **I'll PM you.

**Jack Hodgins **Okay?

**Jack Hodgins **D:

**Jack Hodgins **DODO, THAT WAS NOT A NICE THING TO SAY! SHAME ON YOU!

(**Lance Sweets** likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **ESPECIALLY ONLINE! WASH YOUR MOUTH OUT WITH SOAP!

**Angela Montenegro **All of this caps lock yelling is giving me a migraine...

(**63 **friends like this)

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Lance Sweets**: I love you, DoDo... but profanity? ? :( :( :(

**Lance Sweets **Here's a deal - I won't swear if you stop calling me 'DoDo'.

**Daisy Wick **Deal! ! ! :D :D

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **:D

**Daisy Wick **TTFN, BunBun!

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **BAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

**Lance Sweets ***repeated headdesk*

(**Jack Hodgins **and **17 **friends like this)

* * *

**Colin Fisher** is tired.

**Jack Hodgins **DON'T FALL ASLEEP FOR ANOTHER TWO MONTHS!

**Angela Montenegro **Seriously, baby, I'm pretty sure your caps lock button got stuck. Stop yelling at everyone.

(**91 **friends like this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **thinks **Seeley Booth **can be very male when threatened.

(**Camille Saroyan**, **Angela Montenegro **and **147 **friends like this)

**Hannah Burley **First hand experience of this fact ;)

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Clark Edison ***gags*

**Daisy Wick **You know, Clark, you might wanna work on that gag reflex of yours! ! ! Mine is excellent ;) ;) ;)

**Clark Edison **D: *convulsive gagging*

**Lance Sweets **Daisy! *facepalm*

* * *

**Seeley Booth **just got told the whole story of Billy Elliot in the interrogation room. Every. Single. Detail.

(**88 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **Daisy and I watched that last week! Great movie.

**Wendell Bray **Love it! :)

**Andrew Hacker **I could watch it again and again.

**Jack Hodgins **BEST MOVIE OF ALL TIME!

**Clark Edison **The bit at the end when he says goodbye to his dad always gets me.

**Seeley Booth **... Where are all the men?

(**62 **friends like this)

* * *

**Camille Saroyon **to **Colin Fisher**: Give yourself the benefit of the doubt!

**Colin Fisher** Thanks, Dr Saroyan. I will.

**Colin Fisher **:)

**Camille Saroyan **... Did you just use a smiley face? :O

**Colin Fisher **I... guess I did. You're a lot better than my shrink.

(**Camille Saroyan **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **:( :(

**Camille Saroyan **Jeez, Sweets. It's not like _you're_ his shrink!

(**34 **friends like this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **is happy that Booth liked his rotary telephone.

(**Angela Montenegro **and **104 **friends like this)

**Camille Saroyan **He's wanted one of those for ages!

**Hannah Burley **Thanks so much, Temperance!

**Seeley Booth **And thank YOU :)

**Hannah Burley **You're welcome!

**Temperance Brennan **You're welcome.

**Caroline Julian **Awkward.

(**99 **people like this)

**Angela Montenegro **Awkward :/

**Jack Hodgins **VERY AWKWARD**.**

**Angela Montenegro **FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, JACK, TURN OFF YOUR CAPS LOCK!

(**51 **people like this)

**Jack Hodgins **... Hypocrite.

* * *

**A/N: Ta da! Hope you liked it. I'm not sure if anything I write is funny, or just simply insane, so please do leave me a review informing me of which one it is! :D**

**Peace,**

**-Ellie :)**


	4. The Body and the Bounty

**A/N: These chapters seem to be getting increasingly insane... please do let me know when I become too crazy for you all, and I will endeavor to reign myself in ;) I had a bit of a mind block with this chapter, but here it is – The Body and the Bounty!**

**Also, the lovely Animagus-Steph has requested that I add this warning to my story: ****Please refrain from eating or drinking while reading this piece of fiction. Aspiration of food or drink while laughing could be hazardous to your health.  
;)**

**Enjoy!**

**

* * *

**

**Temperance Brennan **is constructing the perfect murder.

**Wendell Bray **... Theoretically, right?

(**63 **friends like this)

**Temperance Brennan **At this point, yes.

**Wendell Bray **O_O

**Lance Sweets **Dr Brennan, maybe you should come back to therapy...

(**Angela Montenegro **and **40 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **That sounds like fun! ! ! Can I help with the murder? ?

**Temperance Brennan **Of course, Miss Wick.

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **YAAAAY! ! :D :D

**Clark Edison **There's two of them?

(**Daisy Wick **and **Temperance Brennan **like this)

**Angela Montenegro ***facepalm*

**Jack Hodgins **BunBun, your girlfriend has issues.

**Lance Sweets **I had no idea.

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **And seriously, that BunBun joke is getting old!

**Jack Hodgins **Nice try, BunBun. You're not gonna get rid of it THAT easy ;)

**Lance Sweets **:(

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **to **Temperance Brennan**: If you murdered someone, I could totally catch you.

**Temperance Brennan **No.

**Seeley Booth **I could!

**Temperance Brennan **It would be impossible. I'm the best.

**Seeley Booth **So am I ;)

**Daisy Wick **SEXUAL TENSION! ! ! *fans self* :D :D

(**Jack Hodgins **and **79 **friends like this)

**Angela Montenegro **Sweets... keep your girlfriend AWAY from the computer.

**Lance Sweets **Noted.

**Daisy Wick **:( :( ! ! !

**Lance Sweets **Don't worry, Miss Daisy. I'll distract you :)

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) :D :D

**Clark Edison ***gags*

**Jack Hodgins ***barfs*

(**96 **friends like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **is now planning his own perfect murder. And it will be WAY BETTER than **Temperance Brennan**'s.

**Temperance Brennan **I find that to be extremely unlikely.

**Camille Saroyan **I worry about you two...

**Lance Sweets **Seconded. :O

**Wendell Bray **Have you picked a victim yet?

**Jack Hodgins **I NOMINATE DAISY!

(**172 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **WHAT? :O

**Daisy Wick **STOP BEING MEAN, DR HODGINS! ! ! ! :( :( :(

**Angela Montenegro **WILL EVERYONE STOP WITH THE INTERNET YELLING? IT'S VERY AGGRESSIVE!

**Lance Sweets **O_O

**Daisy Wick **PMS? ? ? :) :)

**Jack Hodgins **... Oh God, I regret accepting your friend request.

(**25 **friends like this)

**Seeley Booth **You are ALL going to become my murder victims unless you stop commenting on this damn thing - do you know how many notifications I just got?

(**Temperance Brennan **likes this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **and **6 **friends are now friends with **Bunsen Jude (The Science Dude)**

(**Camille Saroyan **and **Jack Hodgins **like this)

**Jack Hodgins **A-MAZING! :D

**Bunsen Jude **I cannot wait to prove myself as your squintern, Dr Brennan!

**Wendell Bray **... Squintern?

**Arastoo Vaziri **What?

**Daisy Wick **We're being replaced? ? ? ? :O :O

**Colin Fisher **This is not good for my depression.

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **You really are all vultures, aren't you?

(**7 **friends like this)

* * *

**Camille Saroyan **When science gets icky, it's all right to be sicky.

(**Bunsen Jude **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **Really, Cam? *Really*?

**Jack Hodgins **You sound like my desk calendar... :P

**Camille Saroyan **Yes, your desk calendar. On your desk. Where you should be working. Or I'll give you something to be sicky about.

(**56 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **Meep! *runs*

**Wendell Bray **Man, Dr Saroyan, you're badass!

(**Seeley Booth**, **Caroline Julian **and **9 **friends like this)

**Angela Montenegro **Oh, she knows.

(**Camille Saroyan **likes this)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **to **Bunsen Jude**: OBSERVE! ANALYSE! DEDUCE!

(**Bunsen Jude **likes this)

**Bunsen Jude **You are very kind, Dr Hodgins.

**Jack Hodgins **A-MAZING! :D :D

**Bunsen Jude **... And you're also a little creepy.

(**78 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **:(

**Seeley Booth **Oh, burn!

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Camille Saroyan **Does NO ONE work anymore?

(**Caroline Julian**, **Temperance Brennan**, **Angela Montenegro **and **20 **friends like this)

**Camille Saroyan **... *facepalm*

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **Snot, bugs, barbecue sauce... the things you find in a beard these days!

**Clark Edison ***gags*

**Wendell Bray **... Dude, that's disgusting.

(**21** friends like this)

**Seeley Booth **Shave. Now.

(**Wendell Bray **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins** Whoa, whoa! The VICTIM'S beard, not mine! I don't even HAVE a beard! I have sexy stubble!

(**Angela Montenegro **likes this)

**Angela Montenegro **Emphasis on the sexy ;)

**Jack Hodgins **;)

**Daisy Wick **Since when is ginger stubble sexy?

**Jack Hodgins **BUNBUN! *shakes fist*

**Lance Sweets **Sorry, sorry. It's best to just - uh - filter her out... :/

(**53 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **:O :( ! !

**Lance Sweets **x3 :)

**Daisy Wick **:D :D ! !

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **to **Angela Montenegro**: Angie, I feel sick :(

**Angela Montenegro **Did you eat/drink something in the lab again?

**Jack Hodgins** No!

**Jack Hodgins **... Maybe...

**Jack Hodgins **But it was an accident!

**Angela Montenegro **Jack, what did you do?

**Jack Hodgins **... I'll PM you.

**Angela Montenegro **JACK STANLEY HODGINS, HOW COULD YOU BE STUPID ENOUGH TO ACCIDENTALLY DRINK TIGER URINE?

(**Seeley Booth **and **127 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **So much for no more caps lock yelling... :(

* * *

**Seeley Booth **to **Temperance Brennan**: Cavemen fought the T Rex. Fact.

**Temperance Brennan **... I sincerely hope you're being humourous.

(**14 **friends like this)

**Camille Saroyan **Oh no, you said the F-word... :O

(**Vincent Nigel-Murray **likes this)

**Vincent Nigel-Murray** Would it interest you to know that catfish have 27000 tastebuds?

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **Or that the world's most expensive bagel costs 1000 dollars?

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **Or perhaps you didn't know that bathhouses are illegal in California?

**Seeley Booth ***takes out gun and shoots computer screen*

(**85 **friends like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **working with the cadaver dog. Great.

**Temperance Brennan **I don't know why you're harbouring this grudge against Tootie, Booth. She's a very capable dog.

**Daisy Wick **Dogs? ? I love dogs! !

**Lance Sweets **I'm allergic.

**Daisy Wick **What? BunBun that's so sad! ! ! :( :(

**Lance Sweets **It's okay. I have something much nicer to curl up to at night ;)

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **If you both don't stop with the commenting, I'm either going to delete you as Facebook friends, or shoot you. I haven't quite decided yet.

(**Temperance Brennan **and **3 **friends like this)

* * *

**Camille Saroyan **A kind mind is a fine mind.

(**Bunsen Jude **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **... You're getting a tad preachy there, Cam.

(**11 **friends like this)

* * *

**Camille Saroyan **Bring merriment to your experiment.

**Bunsen Jude **Did you make that one up yourself?

(**Seeley Booth **and **5 **friends like this)

**Camille Saroyan **Yes, I did. Why?

**Bunsen Jude **Oh, you can tell. Perhaps you should leave the rhyming to me. :)

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **Someone got pwned - A-MAZING!

(**Bunsen Jude**, **Seeley Booth **and **23 **friends like this)

**Camille Saroyan **Get back to work, Hodgins, or I'll revoke your blue labcoat privileges. You'll have to wear an intern's one instead.

**Jack Hodgins **Fine, fine, I'm working! But only because grey is so not my colour.

(**17 **friends like this)

* * *

**Caroline Julian **appreciates bile and revenge in a man. Just sayin', **Seeley Booth**.

(**58 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **Jeez, Booth, toughen up!

**Angela Montenegro **Jack, why would you say that? I thought you were going to make it through one week with no death threats... *facepalm*

**Seeley Booth **Hodgins, you = dead.

**Camille Saroyan **You're on Facebook AGAIN? Not only are you dead, you are also wearing an intern's labcoat.

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

(**86 **friends like this)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **hates grey labcoats.

**Wendell Bray **I like 'em :)

**Daisy Wick **They go so well with a pink peep-toe heel! ! ! :D :D

(**Angela Montenegro **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **Gee, thanks, Daisy. I'll rush out to buy a pair.

**Daisy Wick **You're welcome! ! ! ! ! :) :)

**Angela Montenegro **They're not that bad, Hodgie.

**Jack Hodgins **They're DISGUSTING. They're not the slightest bit fitted! You can't see my incredibly well-defined musculature under this travesty!

**Wendell Bray **... Dude, that's creepy.

(**63 **friends like this)

* * *

**Bunsen Jude **to **Jack Hodgins**: Science is fun! :)

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **We did Captain Speedy proud! Those throwing knives were A-MAZING!

**Bunsen Jude ***secret* throwing knives! ;)

**Jack Hodgins **Riiiiight! ;)

**Camille Saroyan **O_O

* * *

**Camille Saroyan **WHICH OF YOU IDIOTS GAVE **Jack Hodgins **AN AXE AND/OR THROWING KNIVES? SERIOUSLY?

**Seeley Booth **Whew, pent-up aggression...

**Daisy Wick **PMS? ? ? :) :)

(**Angela Montenegro **likes this)

**Camille Saroyan ***facepalm*

**Jack Hodgins ***evil chuckle*

(**Bunsen Jude **likes this)

* * *

**Lance Sweets **to **Seeley Booth**: Would you *please* stop interrupting my therapy sessions with other clients?

**Seeley Booth **I'm trying to solve a murder here! I'm sure that guy's gonna be fine, whatever his psychological disease. What was it, anyway? Mommy issues? He looked like he had mommy issues.

**Lance Sweets **I can't divulge that information.

**Daisy Wick **Are you talking about his 3 o'clock patient? ? He's got multiple personality disorder and wants a sex change! ! ! :D :D

**Seeley Booth **... Really?

**Lance Sweets **:O Daisy!

**Daisy Wick **Was that one of the things I'm not supposed to say? ? I'm sorry, BunBun! ! !

**Seeley Booth **She must be really, really good in bed, Sweets... I can't see why you'd keep her around otherwise.

**Daisy Wick **I'm a sexual dynamo! ! ! :D :D :D

(**Daisy Wick **and **Lance Sweets **like this)

**Seeley Booth **... How did you manage to take that as a compliment?

(**7 **friends like this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **to **Angela Montenegro**: Is the name 'Temperance' really awful?

**Angela Montenegro **Not... *really* awful...

**Daisy Wick **YES! ! !

**Lance Sweets **Daisy, no.

**Daisy Wick **Darnit! ! I just thought it so hard that I typed it down and pressed the comment button! ! ! :/ :/

**Temperance Brennan **... I don't know what that means.

(**Angela Montenegro **and **28 **friends like this)

* * *

**Bunsen Jude **It's a barbarity that clarity is a rarity. :)

(**Temperance Brennan **likes this)

**Temperance Brennan **It's very true.

**Bunsen Jude **:)

**Temperance Brennan **... I don't know what that means. A colon directly followed by an end parenthesis? That is grammatically incorrect.

(**5 **friends like this)

**Angela Montenegro **Sigh... I'll PM you, sweetie.

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **to **Angela Montenegro**: Angie, can I ask you a favour? Pretty please?

**Angela Montenegro **Sure, Hodgie. Meet me in Egyptology in 15 minutes. ;)

**Jack Hodgins **No, not *that* kind of favour!

**Angela Montenegro **... Seriously? :o

**Jack Hodgins **Yes!

**Angela Montenegro **Then what do you want?

**Jack Hodgins **I was just wondering... if I could maybe trade labcoats with you?

**Jack Hodgins **...?

**Jack Hodgins **How about it, Angie?

**Jack Hodgins **Hello?

**Jack Hodgins **Angela?

**Wendell Bray **BURNED.

(**59 **friends like this)

* * *

**Lance Sweets **to **Temperance Brennan**: Braverman went West. Just sayin'. :)

**Temperance Brennan **It was just a lucky guess.

**Lance Sweets **No it wasn't. I have mad skillz.

**Temperance Brennan **You misspelled 'skills', Dr Sweets.

**Lance Sweets **Sigh...

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **Death by potato gun? Ouch.

(**14 **friends like this)

**Bunsen Jude **Eureka!

**Lance Sweets **Damn, your job sounds fun.

(**Jack Hodgins**, **Angela Montenegro **and **21 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **It IS. Hate to be a grown up. :P

**Camille Saroyan **^ It's not fun. I have to deal with him.

(**Lance Sweets **and **100 **friends like this)

* * *

**Bunsen Jude **to **Temperance Brennan**: So you'll agree to be on my show? :)

**Temperance Brennan **I am in the middle of chasing a suspect, Dude.

**Bunsen Jude **Please? :)

**Temperance Brennan **Very well. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to assist Booth in bringing Braverman into custody.

(**Bunsen Jude **likes this)

**Bunsen Jude **Ever the woman of action! :)

(**5 **friends like this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **Because that is what scientists do.

(**143 **friends like this)

**Bunsen Jude **A-MAZING! Thank you, Dr Brennan. :)

**Temperance Brennan **You're welcome, Dude.

(**3 **friends like this)

**Camille Saroyan **Someone's getting a pay rise ;)

(**Temperance Brennan **likes this)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **to **Camille Saroyan**: Can I have my labcoat back yet?

**Camille Saroyan **No.

**Jack Hodgins **Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! :(

**Angela Montenegro **For the love of God, Cam, give him his labcoat back. It's all he's talked about. For the past three days.

(**10 **friends like this)

**Camille Saroyan **Fine. *headdesk*

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!

* * *

**Daisy Wick **OMG, DR BRENNAN IS ON TV! ! ! :D :D

(**34 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **You're so cute. :)

**Daisy Wick **OMG OMG THIS IS SO EXCITING! ! ! I WONDER IF SHE'D SIGN MY DISSERTATION WHEN I FINISH IT? ? :D :D

**Lance Sweets **I'm sure she would, Daisy. You lived together for 7 months.

**Daisy Wick **EEEEEEEKKKK! SHE IS SO AMAZING! I LOVE HER! I'M GOING TO GO BUY A RED TUTU AND THOSE BIG GLOVES SO I CAN DRESS LIKE HER FOR HALLOWEEN! ! ! :D :D

**Lance Sweets **O_O ...

**Jack Hodgins **... The term 'fangirl' has a whole new meaning.

(**92 **friends like this)

* * *

**A/N: I hope that was -somewhat- amusing for you all! Please do leave me a review and brighten up my day! :D**

**Peace,**

**-Ellie :)**


	5. The Bones That Weren't

**A/N: Remember me? Sorry this chapter has been a long time coming, I've been very busy! I'll be performing in a musical this week, just to let you know, so I won't be able to work on chapter six until after that – please don't hurt hurt me! :O I am also terribly sorry for not replying to reviews this time around – I figured you guys would prefer me to write the chapter sooner! This chapter was a hard one to write, so I really hope you all enjoy it! :D**

**I now present: The Bones That Weren't! ;)  


* * *

**

**Seeley Booth **Beautiful and responsible. How did I get to be so lucky?

**Temperance Brennan **Though I don't necessarily believe in luck, it is true that I am an extremely capable partner, and very attractive.

(**123 **friends like this)

**Seeley Booth **Uh, actually, Bones, I was talking about Hannah...

**Jack Hodgins **Suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuure ;)

(**Angela Montenegro **and **34 **friends like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **to **Hannah Burley**: I'm making dinner tonight. With some of that Burgundy you love. :)

(**Hannah Burley **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **Did you just decide that in an attempt to seem impulsive and romantic?

**Seeley Booth **No!

**Lance Sweets **;)

**Seeley Booth **... Shut up.

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **You should always put the toilet lid down before flushing.

(**21 **friends like this)

**Wendell Bray **O_O

**Angela Montenegro **... Thanks for that, sweetie.

**Daisy Wick **You should also wipe any excess urine off the toilet seat! ! Just saying, **Lance Sweets**! ! ! !

**Lance Sweets **Daisy! That was one time!

**Jack Hodgins **Ha ha, someone got owned! :P

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Angela Montenegro **Actually, Jack, you pee on the toilet seat. All the time.

(**Lance Sweets **and **46 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **Owned!

(**Lance Sweets **and **Daisy Wick **like this)

**Jack Hodgins **Not cool, Angie. Not cool.

(**Angela Montenegro **likes this)

* * *

**Arastoo Vaziri **is glad to be back in the realm of forensic anthropology! :)

(**Camille Saroyan **and **2 **friends like this)

**Camille Saroyan **Glad to have you back, Mr Vaziri.

**Jack Hodgins **'Stoo, my man! :D

(**Arastoo Vaziri **likes this)

**Temperance Brennan **I hope that your time away from this line of scientific inquiry will not have caused you to become totally inadequate.

**Camille Saroyan ***facepalm*

**Daisy Wick **Don't worry Dr Brennan, I'll always be on-hand to help pick up the pieces should Mr Vaziri fail! ! !

**Wendell Bray **Yeah, same here :)

**Clark Edison **As long as things stay professional, I'd be happy to help out this week.

**Seeley Booth **Seriously, vultures. A little discretion might be nice.

(**10 **friends like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **to **Hannah Burley**: Be careful.

**Hannah Burley **Safety first ;)

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **Don't forget the SPF! ! ! ! :D :D

**Seeley Booth **Daisy, get off my profile.

**Seeley Booth **And that is MY joke.

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Lance Sweets**: Why doesn't Agent Booth like me? ? ? :( :(

**Lance Sweets **That's just his way, don't worry about it. You're beautiful, funny and charming - of course he likes you, Miss Daisy! :)

**Seeley Booth **No, I don't.

**Daisy Wick **:( :( :( See? He's a meanie! ! !

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

* * *

**Lance Sweets **to **Seeley Booth**: Stop being a meanie, please.

**Lance Sweets **I'm saying this of my own accord, not because Daisy told me to.

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **You need to limit the amount of times she can use sex as bribery. Just saying.

**Lance Sweets **Who told you she did that?

**Seeley Booth **Point proven.

(**Jack Hodgins **and **2 **friends like this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **is totally jazzed by **Angela Montenegro**'s out-of-the-box, lateral thinking.

(**Angela Montenegro **likes this)

**Angela Montenegro **Aw, shucks! :D

**Zack Addy **I don't understand.

**Temperance Brennan **I didn't at first. Dr Sweets has been teaching me colloquialisms - 'totally jazzed' can be translated as 'extremely enthusiastic'.

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Zack Addy **That makes no sense at all.

(**Temperance Brennan **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **That's what she said. :)

**Jack Hodgins **BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

**Lance Sweets **I didn't mean it like THAT, Hodgins!

**Jack Hodgins **Suuuure you didn't, BunBun ;)

**Zack Addy **I am confused.

**Temperance Brennan **As am I.

(**Angela Montenegro **likes this)

**Angela Montenegro **No amount of PMs can explain 'that's what she said' to the two of you :P

**Zack Addy **?

**Temperance Brennan **I don't know what any of that means.

(**7 **friends like this)

* * *

**Arastoo Vaziri **came to work, and found himself in the future.

(**Temperance Brennan **and **21 **friends like this)

**Temperance Brennan **Although scientifically impossible - I concur, vehemently.

**Jack Hodgins **YES! MY TIME MACHINE WORKS! Should I use my power over the fabric of the universe for good or for evil?

**Angela Montenegro ***facepalm* You can go back in time and stop me from marrying such a dweeb for starters.

(**44 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **ZING!

**Wendell Bray **Damn, that must have hurt.

**Seeley Booth ***high fives*

**Angela Montenegro **;) *high fives back*

**Jack Hodgins **Just for that, I'm not taking you back in time with me to meet Van Gough. OH, SNAP.

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

* * *

**Lance Sweets **to **Jack Hodgins**: Liking your own comment is like high fiving yourself.

(**61 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **Oh yeah? Well - well - you can't grow chest hair!

**Lance Sweets **O_O ... How do you even know that?

**Jack Hodgins **How do you think, BunBun? ;)

**Lance Sweets **Dammit, Daisy! :O

**Daisy Wick **My bad! ! ! ! :D :D :D

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **is going to interrogate street performers with **Seeley Booth**.

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **How come I never get to go out into the field?

**Camille Saroyan **Because you're an embarrassment, Dr Hodgins.

(**Seeley Booth**, **Lance Sweets **and **Angela Montenegro **like this)

**Jack Hodgins **That hurt my feelings :(

**Lance Sweets **Wimp.

(**Camille Saroyan **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **Ouch. Unexpectedly smacked down by Sweets, the guy who cried at 'She's All That'.

(**63 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **How do you even know about that?

**Daisy Wick **Oops! ! :( :(

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **Daisy! Why would you do that?

**Daisy Wick **I tell people secrets to get them to like me! ! Is that so wrong? ?

**Lance Sweets **Sigh... just try to keep some things secret, okay?

**Daisy Wick **Okey-dokey, Shmookie Poo! ! :D :D

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Lance Sweets** Crap.

* * *

**Seeley Booth **Now the statues are coming to life? Just great.

(**16 **friends like this)

**Temperance Brennan **You know it's impossible for statues to come to life, Booth.

**Seeley Booth **Thank you for reminding me, Bones.

**Temperance Brennan ** You're welcome.

**Caroline Julian **You two are so sweet it's giving me tooth decay.

(**135 **friends like this)

**Seeley Booth **We're just friends, Caroline.

**Caroline Julian **I have no idea what you're implying, cherie.

**Seeley Booth **What? But I - I didn't -

**Caroline Julian **You have issues.

(**Lance Sweets **and **3 **friends like this)

* * *

**Lance Sweets **"How far that little candle throws his beams! So shines a good deed in a naughty world."

**Zack Addy **Merchant of Venice, Act 5, Scene 1, Lines 89-90.

**Lance Sweets **O_O

**Seeley Booth **Thou art supposed-eth to be interrogating-eth the suspect-eth. Stop being a poetry nerd and get the job done.

**Daisy Wick **Lancelot, Lancelot, wherefore art thou Lancelot? ? ;) ;)

**Lance Sweets **Love goes toward love as schoolboys from their books; but love from love, toward school with heavy looks. ;)

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **X3 :D

**Seeley Booth **Jeez, Sweets, flirting through Shakespeare? Why didn't you just make the girl a mix tape?

(**41 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **He did! ! It has 'Lime in Da Coconut' on it! ! :D :D

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Seeley Booth ***headdesk*

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **is going to visit **Hannah Burley **in the hospital.

**Angela Montenegro **What happened?

**Seeley Booth **She was shot.

**Angela Montenegro **Oh my God, Booth, are you okay?

**Daisy Wick **YAY! ! ! ! :D :D

(**Caroline Julian **likes this)

**Angela Montenegro ***facepalm*

* * *

**Seeley Booth **to **Lance Sweets**: After I go to the hospital, and check that my girlfriend is still breathing, I am going to your apartment and making sure yours is not.

**Lance Sweets **O_O

**Daisy Wick **Eeek! ! ! :O

**Jack Hodgins **I would recommend running to Canada. Quebec is lovely this time of year.

(**Angela Montenegro **likes this)

* * *

**Lance Sweets **to **Seeley Booth**: Daisy took off, screaming about 'Canada' and 'Semperance'. I hope you're happy.

**Seeley Booth **My girlfriend just got shot. I'm ecstatic.

**Temperance Brennan **I believe Booth is being sarcastic.

(**11 **friends like this)

**Seeley Booth **Thanks, Bones.

**Temperance Brennan **... I can't tell if he's being sarcastic this time.

**Seeley Booth **I'm not, Bones.

**Temperance Brennan **But that could also be sarcasm...

**Seeley Booth **Never mind.

**Temperance Brennan **Was that sarcasm?

**Seeley Booth **Sigh...

* * *

**Hannah Burley **to **Temperance Brennan**: Thanks for saving my life. :)

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Temperance Brennan** You're welcome.

**Seeley Booth **Really - thanks, Bones. You're the best.

**Temperance Brennan **I know.

**Camille Saroyan **Wait, what happened?

**Jack Hodgins **Something is wrong here.

**Lance Sweets **You all need some serious therapy.

(**59 **friends like this)

* * *

**Arastoo Vaziri **is going dumpster diving with **Jack Hodgins**.

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Temperance Brennan **Is that some form of sexual innuendo?

**Arastoo Vaziri **O_O

**Wendell Bray **O_O

**Jack Hodgins **O_O

**Clark Edison ***gags*

**Angela Montenegro **Sigh. Check your PM inbox, sweetie.

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **to **Jack Hodgins**: Doctor Hodgins, would you please report to the forensic platform? I need you to be a corpse.

**Wendell Bray **Ha ha, Hodgins is always the murder victim!

(**Zack Addy **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **:(

* * *

**Camille Saroyan **Never arm **Temperance Brennan **with a razor-sharp blade. I'm pretty sure I just suffered a heart palpitation.

(**Angela Montenegro **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **Agreed. O_O

**Temperance Brennan **I don't know that means.

* * *

**Hannah Burley **loves her big, scary protecter ;)

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **Rawr ;)

**Clark Edison ***gags*

**Lance Sweets **Seconded.

**Angela Montenegro **Agreed.

**Caroline Julian **Get a room!

**Jack Hodgins **Dude, they have Facebook chat for a reason!

(**37 **friends like this)

**Hannah Burley **... Um, wow.

**Seeley Booth **Thanks for killing the moment, guys.

**Jack Hodgins **No problem, bud! :D

* * *

**Hannah Burley **to **Temperance Brennan**: Thanks for the sunglasses, Temperance! 8D

(**Temperance Brennan **likes this)

**Temperance Brennan **Though typing '8D' makes no grammatical sense, you are welcome. They look good on you.

**Hannah Burley **Thanks! We're quite a pair :)

**Temperance Brennan **I concur, vehemently.

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

* * *

**Lance Sweets **misses Daisy :(

**Angela Montenegro **Wait... you mean she actually went to Canada?

**Lance Sweets **Booth scared her away.

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Camille Saroyan **So, she went to Canada?

**Lance Sweets **Quebec, apparently.

**Jack Hodgins **Smart girl.

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

* * *

**Daisy Wick **Quebec isn't nearly as glamourous as I thought it would be! ! ! :( :(

**Lance Sweets **Daisy, please come home.

**Daisy Wick **No way! ! I don't want Agent Booth to kill me! ! I have so much to live for! ! I only need my Royal Diner loyalty card stamped one more time to get a free slice of cherry pie! ! !

**Seeley Booth **You know what, Daisy, if you give me that loyalty card, I promise not to shoot you.

**Seeley Booth **… This week.

**Daisy Wick **YAY! ! ! Thank you, Agent Booth! ! We're close, right? ? :D :D

**Seeley Booth **... Sure.

**Daisy Wick ***HUGS*

**Lance Sweets ***hugs* :D

**Daisy Wick **Lancelot! ! ! *kisses*

**Lance Sweets **Miss Daisy ;) *kisses back*

**Daisy Wick **I missed you! ! ! ;) ;) *lies down on bed*

**Lance Sweets **I missed you more ;) *unbuttons shirt*

**Seeley Booth **FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, DO NOT FINISH THIS CONVERSATION.

(**152 **friends like this)

* * *

**A/N: There you have it! I seriously can't tell when/if I'm being funny or not, so please do not hesitate to let me know that I fail at this (or you could say nice stuff too, that would be appreciated!) :D**

**Peace,**

**-Ellie :)**


	6. The Shallow in the Deep

**A/N: Hello, strangers :P I honestly can't apologize enough for the delay in getting this chapter up, but here is my attempt: ! My musical went really well (I ended up being spotted! :D), but I had a lot of work to catch up when I got back to school, etc. I hope this was worth the wait!**

**I had fun with this one, Crazy Daisy that I am... so I hope you'll all enjoy it too :)**

**It's Shallow in the Deep, babe. ;)**

**

* * *

**

**Daisy Wick **to **Lance Sweets**: Hey! ! Are you at work? ? I want to... return that book you let me borrow! ! ! ;) ;)

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **I'm here. Come on over :)

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **;) ;) ;)

* * *

**Seeley Booth**'s skeleton is apparently falling apart. Thanks, **Temperance Brennan**.

**Temperance Brennan **It only makes sense, Booth. Think of all the injuries you've sustained - a compression fracture to your T3, a sternum fracture from when that obese girl shot you, fractures to the metatarsals caused by torture, rib pitting from when you tried to act as a human shield (foolishly), not to mention compromised ligaments - both intertransverse and interior longitudinal.

(**76 **friends like this)

**Camille Saroyan **Uh, wow.

**Wendell Bray **O_O

**Angela Montenegro **Sweetie, how do you even remember all of that?

**Temperance Brennan **I care about Booth, Angela.

**Jack Hodgins **^ Translation: "I love Booth so much I committed his entire medical history to memory, Angela."

(**148 **friends like this)

**Seeley Booth **Go away, Hodgins.

(**12 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **Defensive much?

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **I don't care if my skeleton is falling apart, I will still shoot you.

**Jack Hodgins ***gulp* D:

(**Angela Montenegro **and **Camille Saroyan **like this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **walked in on **Lance Sweets **and **Daisy Wick **during intercourse.

(**7 **friends like this)

**Arastoo Vaziri **O_O

**Clark Edison ***gags* *chokes* *splutters* *dies*

(**51 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **:O Dr Brennan!

**Angela Montenegro **Sweetie... you should take things like this to the grave. *NOT* post them on Facebook.

(**Lance Sweets**, **Daisy Wick **and **9 **friends like this)

**Temperance Brennan **I am confused. The little box at the top asked me, 'what's on your mind?', and at that present moment, the image of Miss Wick and Dr Sweets in the act of coitus was what was occupying my thoughts.

**Angela Montenegro **I'll PM you and explain everything. Please stop talking.

(**33 **friends like this)

* * *

**Lance Sweets **and **Daisy Wick **are not in a relationship.

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **Agent Booth, you are really not very nice! ! !

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Daisy Wick ***cries* Meanie! ! ! !

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **:( :(

* * *

**Lance Sweets **and **Daisy Wick **are having accidental intercourse.

(**Daisy Wick **and **2 **friends like this)

**Camille Saroyan **... *Accidental* intercourse?

**Wendell Bray **How does that even work?

**Angela Montenegro **Don't ASK them that!

(**51 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **... Isn't that, like, rape?

**Arastoo Vaziri **O_O

**Clark Edison ***gags* *bleaches brain*

(**Camille Saroyan **and **90 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **It's not rape if it's consensual! ! ! ! !

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Camille Saroyan **... I don't think I've ever felt so awkward in my life.

(**144 **friends like this)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **OMG! Pink alien organism anchored to the bone! BEST CASE EVER!

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Angela Montenegro **... You're lucky you're cute.

(**29 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **to **Angela Montenegro**: Watch your step, Angie. If you keep making fun of my alien organism, I won't name it after you :P

**Angela Montenegro **You'd name it after me? :D

**Jack Hodgins **Angelonicas Montenegris ;)

(**Angela Montenegro **likes this)

**Angela Montenegro **That is SO sweet. Meet me in Egyptology in 5 minutes? ;)

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **Rawr ;)

**Camille Saroyan **For the love of God, people - this is what Facebook mail is FOR!

**Camille Saroyan **Also - WHY DOES NO ONE IN THIS LAB WORK?

(**5 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **Jeez, Cam. Take a chill pill. Have you thought about going to see Sweets, what with this anger management problem of yours?

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Camille Saroyan **If I do not see you at your work station now, heads will roll. Namely, that skull with the pink fuzz will be rolled into the trashcan.

**Angela Montenegro **... Cam, it's evidence - you can't do that.

**Jack Hodgins **That's what we thought about the ugly labcoat situation! TTYL, Angie!

(**Camille Saroyan **likes this)

**Angela Montenegro ***facepalm*

* * *

**Lance Sweets **to **Seeley Booth**: Can I ask you a personal question? ... Uh, it's not for me! It's for my friend... Vance. Yeah, Vance. And his girlfriend... Maisy.

**Seeley Booth **You're gonna ask me anyway, aren't you?

**Lance Sweets **Okay, so I - I mean my friend Vance - broke up with D... Maisy, but he can't seem to keep his hands off her. She's like a magnet, you know? So, should I... Vance try to resist her? Or just give in to... Maisy?

**Seeley Booth **Sure.

**Lance Sweets **To which option?

**Seeley Booth **I don't know. Both of 'em.

**Lance Sweets **You're not being very helpful to m - VANCE, Agent Booth.

**Seeley Booth **Use an eight ball or toss a coin or something. I've seen way too much of your and Daisy's relationship.

**Lance Sweets **What? I wasn't talking about Daisy!

**Seeley Booth **You're not exactly subtle.

**Angela Montenegro **Yeah, it's kinda obvious, sweetie. Don't pick names that rhyme next time.

**Angela Montenegro ** ^ Though, that was a rhyme!

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **This is why I married you. :D

**Lance Sweets ***bashes head off wall*

(**Seeley Booth**, **Jack Hodgins **and **8 **friends like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **to **Temperance Brennan**: Victim was 28.

**Temperance Brennan **I am certain you're incorrect. His bones suggest that he was 19, 20 at the oldest.

**Seeley Booth **You're wrong.

**Temperance Brennan **I am not wrong.

**Seeley Booth **Yes, you are!

**Temperance Brennan **I am not.

**Seeley Booth **Are too!

**Temperance Brennan **Am not.

**Seeley Booth **Are too times infinity! You lose!

**Temperance Brennan **... That makes absolutely no sense. Multiplying a phrase by infinity is both mathematically and grammatically impossible.

(**17 **friends like this)

**Camille Saroyan **Seriously, people. This is how you spend valuable, murder-solving time? I give up.

(**Jack Hodgins**, **Seeley Booth **and **Temperance Brennan **like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **The awkward moment when the guy you thought was your murder victim is actually alive.

(**36 **friends like this)

**Temperance Brennan **I told you I was right. I am always right.

(**Daisy Wick**, **Zack Addy **and **20 **friends like this)

**Seeley Booth **... You got lucky. That's all.

**Daisy Wick **Someone's in deni-aaal! ! ! ! ! :P :P

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, DAISY, GET OFF MY PROFILE!

**Cam Saroyan **WHY IS NOBODY WORKING?

**Angela Montenegro **STOP THE CAPS LOCK YELLING!

(**7 **friends like this)

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Jack Hodgins**: Dr Brennan got mad at me 'cause I didn't have the bones! ! ! ! This is all your fault! ! !

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **Poopie-head! ! !

**Jack Hodgins **Poopie-head? Ouch. That hurt.

**Daisy Wick **Everyone at work is mean to me! ! ! :( :(

(**Jack Hodgins **and **Seeley Booth **like this)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **ALIEN ORGANISM = TYPE OF BENTHIC WORM! YAAAAAAAAAY!

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Caroline Julian **Poor, poor Angela.

(**Angela Montenegro **and **87 **friends like this)

* * *

**Angela Montenegro **One person gets killed and it's murder. Millions get killed and it's history.

**Wendell Bray **... Wow, that's really depressing.

**Colin Fisher **Amen.

**Angela Montenegro ***facepalm*

**Temperance Brennan **It's a barbarity that clarity is a rarity.

(**Busen Jude **likes this)

**Wendell Bray **Huh?

**Angela Montenegro **It's best to just smile and nod, Wendell.

(**53 **people like this)

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Lance Sweets**: Dr Hodgins hit me in the face with a bendy straw wrapper! ! ! It was mean :( :(

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **Don't worry, I'll talk to him.

**Daisy Wick ** :D :D :D :D ! !

* * *

**Seeley Booth **to **Lance Sweets**: You're not actually going to talk to Hodgins, are you?

**Lance Sweets **Shhhh! :/

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **Turns out the alien organism already had a name. :(

(**Camille Saroyan **and **2 **friends like this)

**Caroline Julian **You can handle the disappointment. You're a big boy.

**Daisy Wick **Meh - I've seen bigger! ! ! ! ! ;) ;)

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Angela Montenegro **TMI :O

**Nora Oldhouse **Hi! This is Clark's girlfriend - he's choking and gagging too much to comment his disgust about this whole affair, so he asked me to do it for him: *gags*. Lovely to meet you all!

(**Angela Montenegro **and **3 **friends like this)

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Temperance Brennan**: What you saw this morning - Lance and I are like deer! ! ! Lance was just pushing me uphill! ! ! :D :D

**Temperance Brennan **Up what hill?

(**17 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets ***facepalm*

* * *

**Daisy Wick **has issues! ! ! :( :(

**Lance Sweets **I had no idea.

**Jack Hodgins **Aaaand the reason why he's dating her is finally clear!

(**162 **friends like this)

**Seeley Booth **Up top! *high fives*

**Jack Hodgins ***high fives back*

**Daisy Wick **You people are mean! ! !

(**Jack Hodgins **and **Seeley Booth **like this)

**Lance Sweets **Ignore them, Daisy. Wanna come by my office? I have another... book you might be interested in!

(**Daisy Wick **like this)

**Daisy Wick **;) ;) ;)

* * *

**Daisy Wick **and **Lance Sweets **are having casual sex.

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Wendell Bray **O_O

**Camille Saroyan **Um, wow...

**Angela Montenegro **Your relationship statuses are making me nauseous. That, or the tuna melt I had for lunch. But I'm pretty sure it's the first thing.

(**11 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **Just because Daisy and I are no longer dating, it doesn't mean we can't... see each other... casually... every once in a while.

**Temperance Brennan **I don't see why I should care about this. Are you planning on having sex in the lab?

**Daisy Wick **We're not! ! The fact that there are security cameras there freaks Lance out! ! ! ;) ;)

**Lance Sweets **Daisy! :O

**Camille Saroyan **I can't believe you even asked that question, Dr Brennan.

(**29 **friends like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **is on the creepy cougar cruise with **Temperance Brennan**.

(**13 **friends like this)

**Angela Montenegro **Miaow ;)

(**5 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **Hey! Why wasn't *I* invited?

**Seeley Booth **Because nobody likes you, Hodgins.

(**158 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **Nice try, everyone loves me! xD

**Daisy Wick **I don't love you! ! !

**Clark Edison **Neither do I.

**Colin Fisher **I don't love anyone. ... But especially not you.

**Lance Sweets **You always make fun of my ties. It's uncool.

**Wendell Bray **No offence, but you're kind of an ass, dude.

**Camille Saroyan **You are the worst employee - ever.

**Jack Hodgins **:O Blasphemy! ... Well, Angela loves me! Right, Angie?

**Jack Hodgins **... Angie?

**Angela Montenegro **Um... *whistles nonchalantly*

(**59 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **:O :(

(**Seeley Booth **and **2 **friends like this)

* * *

**Lance Sweets **to **Temperance Brennan**: I resent being referred to as the "virgin offering".

**Temperance Brennan **But that's what you were, Dr Sweets.

**Daisy Wick **Oh, he's not a virgin! ! ! Far from it, in fact! ! ;) ;) ;)

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Clark Edison **I - cannot - even -

**Clark Edison ***gags repeatedly*

(**46 **friends like this)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **PIRANHA TIME! :D

**Angela Montenegro **Oh, God.

**Camille Saroyan **I'm going to pretend you didn't just say that.

(**37 **friends like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **walked in on someone for the second time today. Haven't you people ever heard of locks?

(**14 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **Haven't YOU ever heard of knocking?

(**Daisy Wick **and **8 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **Hehehehehehehe! ! ! ! That was funny, baby! ! :D :D

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **The shrink has a point, Booth. One would think you were enjoying it! :P

**Seeley Booth **^ The above comment + my gun + the immediate future = dead Hodgins.

**Jack Hodgins **AHH! *runs*

* * *

**Camille Saroyan **to **Jack Hodgins**: For the fifth time today, WHY ARE YOU NOT WORKING, DR HODGINS?

**Jack Hodgins **I had to go to the mall and stock up on provisions - I'm hiding out in my nuclear war shelter until Booth calms down.

**Camille Saroyan **I don't care if he shoots you, I want work DONE. Everybody is working. Even DAISY is working. You are the clog in my drain, Dr Hodgins.

**Daisy Wick **Teehee, that's what she said! ! ! ;) ;)

**Angela Montenegro **Oh my God. :O

**Jack Hodgins **No way... D:

**Lance Sweets ***shakes head sadly*

**Camille Saroyan **O_O ... Okay, so Daisy's not working. But everyone else is.

**Daisy Wick **I am too working! ! ! I'm a great multi-tasker ;) ;) ;) ;)

**Lance Sweets **Daisy...!

**Camille Saroyan **... Okay. Hodgins - work. I'm going to go bash my head off a wall and pretend this never happened.

(**78 **friends like this)

* * *

**Daisy Wick **had a great lunch out with **Jack Hodgins**! ! ! We talked about Sardinian cheese! ! ! :D :D

(**Lance Sweets **and **2 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **That's nice :) I told you, everyone likes you - you have nothing to worry about!

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **:D :D

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **to **Angela Montenegro**: Where WERE you for lunch? Miss Wick doesn't understand that you need to stop talking when you start eating. I had chunks of food all over me. I was contemplating calling Booth and asking him to shoot me. Seriously.

**Angela Montenegro **Sorry, babe. I forgot. I love you? :P

**Jack Hodgins **I love you too, even the charcoal-y bits.

**Angela Montenegro **Sap.

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **You love it ;)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **Dr Sweets is - to use the colloquialism - "wasted".

(**Seeley Booth **and **39 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **Nooooo I'm not! I swore!

**Lance Sweets ***sewer

**Lance Sweets ***swear! See? I'm fiiiine!

**Temperance Brennan **I rest my case.

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **I have taught you well. ;)

(**Temperance Brennan **likes this)

* * *

**Daisy Wick **is having fun role-playing with Dr Hodgins! ! ! :D :D

**Lance Sweets **... Role-playing? O_O

**Jack Hodgins **Not THAT kind of role-playing, creeper. We re-enacted the case. She threw me off the forensic platform. Why? Is someone *jealous*? :P

**Lance Sweets **What? ... No...

**Daisy Wick **I didn't want to use the cushions for his fall, so it'd be more realistic, but he threatened to sue me! ! ! :( :( And the charges just got dropped from my last lawsuit... ! !

**Camille Saroyan **Do I want to know?

**Lance Sweets **No. Believe me, you do not.

(**Camille Saroyan **and **61 **friends like this)

* * *

**Lance Sweets **to **Daisy Wick**: Royal Diner at 9? We need to talk.

**Jack Hodgins **SOMEONE'S GETTING DUMPED!

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **Go away, Dr Hodgins! ! ! Sure thing, Lance - it's a date (a casual one... with no strings attached! ! !)

**Lance Sweets **:S...

* * *

**Daisy Wick** to **Lance Sweets**: Screech and Jessie totally should've hooked up! ! !

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **Because they had more in common than they realised. :)

**Daisy Wick **I have all the seasons of DVD :D :D Come over and watch it sometime? ?

**Lance Sweets **It's a date ;)

**Daisy Wick **S Q Q Q Q U U U U U E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E! ! ! ! ! !

**Angela Montenegro **Just READING that hurt my ears...

(**94 **friends like this)

* * *

**Lance Sweets **and **Daisy Wick **are in a relationship.

(**82 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **Daisy xD *hugs*

**Daisy Wick **BUNBUN! ! :D :D *hugs* ! !

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **Um, Daisy? As much as I love your new nicknames... Could we maybe go back to 'Lancelot'? Please?

**Daisy Wick **Lancelot! ! :D :D

**Lance Sweets **Want to come over? Stay the night? ;)

**Daisy Wick **Always! ! ! ;) ;) ;)

**Camille Saroyan **Wow...

**Wendell Bray **O_O

**Clark Edison **Oh God, they're back.

(**Daisy Wick**, **Lance Sweets** and **129 **friends like this)

* * *

**Angela Montenegro **to **Camille Saroyan**: Well done tonight. You did us all proud. :D

(**56 **friends like this)

**Camille Saroyan **Thank you for the beautiful artwork, Angela :)

(**19 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **WHEW, GO CAM! *waves flag*

**Temperance Brennan **Good work, Cam.

**Seeley Booth **Agreed. :)

**Lance Sweets **It's a great exhibit :D

**Camille Saroyan **Aw, shucks. :)

**Daisy Wick **LANCELOT AND I ARE BACK TOGETHER! ! ! :D :D

**Lance Sweets **... Daisy, they know.

**Daisy Wick **Just checking! ! :D :D I love you! ! ! X3

**Lance Sweets **I love you more ;)

**Seeley Booth **That is it. You're BOTH dead. *loads gun*

**Daisy Wick **But but but - we haven't even reached the Valentine's Saved By the Bell episode! ! ! We can't die yet! ! D: D:

**Seeley Booth **...

**Seeley Booth **... Is she serious?

**Lance Sweets **It's her favourite one. Mine too. We have that in common :D

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **... I give up. *headdesk*

(**149 **friends like this)

* * *

**A/N: Have I lost my touch? Should I just leave right now? :P Do let me know, reviews make my LIFE! :D**

**Peace,**

**-Ellie :)**


	7. The Babe in the Bar

**A/N: Hello beautiful people! Now, I could spend a good paragraph rambling about my various commitments and activities and how they leave me with no free time, but I feel like I've done a lot of that in previous updates, so let's just say, 'Ellie is very busy and is sorry this took so long.' There. Perfect. **

**Anyway, today's chapter is The Babe in the Bar – I hope you all enjoy it! :D**

**

* * *

**

**Camille Saroyan **Latest victim found in a gigantic chocolate bar. I don't know about you, but I'm skipping breakfast.

(**18 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **I LOVE chocolate!

**Jack Hodgins **Dude, that's really all you got from her status?

(**5 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **Chocolate is awesome!

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **I bet you the vic's an Oompa Loompa.

**Temperance Brennan **I don't know what that means.

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **Yes you do! You know, they're green and orange, and they bob up and down all the time?

**Temperance Brennan **Like the Orange-thighed Tree Frog of Queensland, Australia?

(**Jack Hodgins**, **Camille Saroyan **and **51 **friends like this)

**Seeley Booth **... Never mind.

* * *

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **is back at the Jeffersonian! After travel, an over-indulgent lifestyle, the occasional game of chance, a brief stint in rehab... Uh... Perhaps it would interest you to know that, on average, 100 people choke to death on ballpoint pens every year?

(**7 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **Wait, rehab?

**Colin Fisher **Dude, you were in rehab? Where? Why didn't you hit me up?

**Temperance Brennan **You neglected to mention that in your reapplication for the position of intern, Mr Nigel-Murray.

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **Did I? It must've - ahem - slipped my mind! By the way, rubber bands last longer when refrigerated!

**Temperance Brennan **... Thank you, Mr Nigel-Murray.

(**Vincent Nigel-Murray **and **2 **friends like this)

* * *

**Lance Sweets **to **Vincent Nigel-Murray**: Welcome back! Um, sorry you lost all your money...

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **Oh, it's quite all right. I still have my memories - THAILAND! ;)

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **Which, by the way, has Thai boxing as its national sport.

**Lance Sweets **Is everyone hooking up with women in exotic countries now?

(**Vincent Nigel-Murray**, **Colin Fisher **and **Jack Hodgins **like this)

**Colin Fisher **Everyone except you.

**Jack Hodgins **OH, BURN!

**Angela Montenegro **Neither are you, Jack.

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Wendell Bray **Ouch, served.

(**Angela Montenegro **and **9 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **Shh, Angie! :(

* * *

**Camille Saroyan **to **Michelle Welton**: John's Hopkins - another college to add to your list! :)

**Michelle Welton **Thanks, Cam. Will be over in a min!

**Daisy Wick **I DID AN INTERNSHIP AT JOHN'S HOPKINS! ! ! ! ! :D :D

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Camille Saroyan **... We know, Daisy.

**Daisy Wick **Just reminding you! ! ! Hey, I'm thinking of going back there in the summer - maybe I'll be teaching Michelle! ! ! ! :D :D :D

**Camille Saroyan **...

* * *

**Camille Saroyan **Actually, Michelle... take John's Hopkins off your list.

(**Michelle Welton **and **Seeley Booth **like this)

**Daisy Wick **Huh? ? ? ? :S :S

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **Chocolate time! :D

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Angela Montenegro **... Oh, God.

**Camille Saroyan **Just FYI, YOU are cleaning this up, Dr Hodgins.

**Jack Hodgins **Your lack of faith in my abilities hurts my feelings.

(**11 **friends like this)

**Camille Saroyan **Good.

(**Angela Montenegro **and **38 **friends like this)

* * *

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **to **Michelle Welton**: Perhaps it would interest you to know that England has some top class universities - Oxford, Cambridge...

(**Michelle Welton **likes this)

**Camille Saroyan **That's it, Mr Nigel-Murray. I am going to choke you on your own trivia, and stuff your lifeless body in a locker.

**Wendell Bray **O_O

**Lance Sweets **... Um, Dr Saroyan, perhaps you should come in for a therapy session...

**Seeley Booth **NGL, even I'm a little scared...

(**Camille Saroyan **and **83 **friends like this)

**Vincent Nigel-Murray** Eek! :O

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **to **Vincent Nigel-Murray **Just PM'd you the combination to the door of my nuclear war shelter. You need it.

(**Vincent Nigel-Murray **likes this)

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **Thanks a million, Dr Hodgins! Did you know that a snail can sleep for three years?

**Jack Hodgins **For the love of God, Vincent, stop spouting facts and get in the shelter *before* Cam MURDERS you!

(**Angela Montenegro **and **13 **friends like this)

* * *

**Michelle Welton **is going to uni with **Derek Saunders**. It's *my* decision.

**(Derek Saunders **likes this)

**Camille Saroyan **B-b-but, I want what's best for you, Michelle...

**Michelle Welton **This is what I want!

**Angela Montenegro **Awkward...

**Jack Hodgins **Awkward squared to the power of ten times four...

**Michelle Welton **Also, Cam, tell your co-workers to stop adding me on Facebook! It's creepy!

(**Derek Saunders **and **4 **friends like this)

**Angela Montenegro **Um...

**Jack Hodgins **... Now it really *is* awkward.

(**30 **friends like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **YOWZA.

(**Temperance Brennan **likes this)

**Temperance Brennan **Are you making these sexually predatory remarks about other women because Hannah's away?

**Hannah Burley **... Wait, what?

(**Temperance Brennan **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **Hannah - it's nothing. Bones - just... no.

**Hannah Burley **O_O

**Temperance Brennan **I thought it was rather amusing. Yowza!

(**Lance Sweets **and **47 **friends like this)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **created an event: **HODGINS AND ANGELA'S SUPER BIG SURPRISE ANNOUNCEMENT GATHERING!**

**(Camille Saroyan **and **Temperance Brennan **like this)

**Angela Montenegro **... *facepalm*

**Camille Saroyan **I wonder what this could be about! :)

**Camille Saroyan **(was that convincing, Angela? ?)

**Angela Montenegro **... *repeated facepalm*

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **posted on **HODGINS AND ANGELA'S SUPER BIG SURPRISE ANNOUNCEMENT GATHERING!**'s wall.

**Jack Hodgins **Founding Fathers, tomorrow night! CAN'T WAIT TO TELL YOU OUR SURPRISE! :D :D

(**3 **friends like this)

**Angela Montenegro **Careful, Hodgie. We wouldn't want to... *cough* give away the surprise.

**Jack Hodgins **Sorry, Angie! I'm excited! :D :D

**Camille Saroyan **What surprise? ;)

**Camille Saroyan **(was that better, Angela? ;D)

**Angela Montenegro **... Oh, dear God.

**Jack Hodgins **:D

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **thinks that **Seeley Booth **looks rather amusing in a shower cap.

(**Angela Montenegro **and **Hannah Burley **like this)

**Seeley Booth **Hey, shut up, Bones! This shower cap totally suits me. I look hot.

**Temperance Brennan **I disagree.

**Seeley Booth **I look better than you. :P

**Temperance Brennan **Although I am unsure what ':P' means, as it is grammatically incorrect, it is clear that I looked best.

(**Hannah Burley **and **72 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **You could cut the sexual tension with a knife! ! ! ! ! :D :D

**Hannah Burley **... What?

**Seeley Booth **Nothing, Hannah. How's Munich? I love you. xxx

**Seeley Booth **Oh, and - DAISY, I AM GOING TO KILL YOU.

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **Uh oh... :S

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Vincent Nigel-Murray**: Get out of the nuclear shelter, I need to get in there! ! ! ! ! ! D: D:

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **No way, Dr Saroyan is going to murder me! Though, perhaps it might interest you to know that the dial tone of a normal telephone is in the key of F?

**Daisy Wick **Agent Booth is going to shoot *me*! ! ! And Lancelot and I have a karaoke date, which I can't make if I'm dead! ! ! ! ! D: D: D:

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **As much as I'd like to witness the demise of Miss Wick, I need you out of the nuclear shelter, Vincent. Experiment time!

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **But -

**Jack Hodgins **King of the Lab. I win. Now get your ass over here.

**Jack Hodgins **Oh, bring lamps with you.

**Jack Hodgins **Lots and lots of lamps. :D

**Angela Montenegro **... Does anyone else hear evil laughter?

(**Jack Hodgins **and **63 **friends like this)

* * *

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **to **Jack Hodgins**: Hairdryers would be much more efficient in melting the chocolate than lamps! Did you know that it is against the law to sleep under a hairdryer in Florida?

**Jack Hodgins **Lamps pwn hairdryers.

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **But -

**Jack Hodgins **Nope. King of the Lab. Your argument is invalid.

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **I -

**Jack Hodgins **Turning the lamps on now! 8D

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **Very well. There is an average of 178 sesame seeds in a McDonald's burger bun, just by-the-by.

**Jack Hodgins **Nah, the facts can't ruin it for me! :D

(**17 **friends like this)

* * *

**Camille Saroyan **to **Vincent Nigel-Murray**: Mr Nigel-Murray, if I didn't have any self-control, I would kiss you.

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **... Perhaps you could bestow a kiss anyway?

**Camille Saroyan **... No.

(**Jack Hodgins**, **Angela Montenegro **and **44 **others like this)

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **Ah. Quite right...

**Angela Montenegro **What's this? Vincent Nigel-Murray left factless?

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **Did you know that there are more than 10 million bricks in the Empire State Building?

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **Or that pearls melt in vinegar?

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **Or perhaps it would interest you to know that the average life span of a tastebud is 10 days?

**Seeley Booth ***headdesk*

**Jack Hodgins **Dammit, Angie!

(**80 **friends like this)

* * *

**Lance Sweets **There's no way that a ruthless murder is going to destroy my love of chocolate!

(**Daisy Wick **and **39 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **You tell 'em, baby! ! ! ! ! :D :D

**Seeley Booth **Maybe *you* need to see a shrink...

**Lance Sweets **It's not happening, Agent Booth. I love chocolate too much.

**Daisy Wick **I love YOU too much! ! ! !

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **Wanna come over? I have chocolate! ;)

**Daisy Wick **Ooh, sounds like fun! ! ! ;) ;) ;)

**Clark Edison **O_O *gags*

**Jack Hodgins **Scarred for life, scarred for life!

**Seeley Booth **I'm not even surprised anymore.

(**97 **friends like this)

* * *

**Lance Sweets **to **Seeley Booth**: The victim used to work manufacturing bustier bras. Don't you love those things? Very sexy. They kind of - squeeze the - ... I'll stop talking now.

**Seeley Booth **Appreciated.

**Daisy Wick **I'll change into one before I come over, baby! ! ! ! :D :D

**Clark Edison ***splutters*

**Angela Montenegro **TMI! :O

**Seeley Booth **I think I've just lost the will to care...

(**52 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **Teehee! ! ! :D :D

* * *

**Angela Montenegro **to **Camille Saroyan**: Maybe you should go talk to Sweets about you-know-who?

**Jack Hodgins **Voldemort?

**Angela Montenegro ***Michelle*!

**Camille Saroyan **Thanks, Angela, but I don't want to talk to a child about a child.

**Lance Sweets **Hey!

**Jack Hodgins **Aw, did we hurt your feelings, babyface? :P

**Lance Sweets **I hate you all.

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **posted on **HODGINS AND ANGELA'S SUPER BIG SURPRISE ANNOUNCEMENT GATHERING!**'s wall.

**Jack Hodgins **So, who's coming tomorrow night? EVERYONE? :D :D

**Camille Saroyan **I am! It's just a normal night with friends, right?

**Jack Hodgins **Yup, just a gathering... little bit of news... no big deal! :D

**Camille Saroyan **Great! I will see you there.

**Camille Saroyan **(was that subtle, Angela? ;D)

**Jack Hodgins **See you!

**Jack Hodgins **(I didn't give it away, did I, Angie?)

**Angela Montenegro **Neither of you should be allowed near a computer.

(**31 **friends like this)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **Just your average chocolate bar - ant torsos, spider legs...

**Camille Saroyan **That's average? D:

**Angela Montenegro **I'm gonna throw up.

**Clark Edison ***gags*

**Wendell Bray **Eww!

**Lance Sweets **Nope, still can't ruin it for me!

**Daisy Wick ** YAY CHOCOLATE! ! ! :D :D :D

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Wendell Bray **... You guys are weird.

(**59 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **Amen.

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **had a very bad experience drinking Belomo's Sparkling Wine.

(**98 **friends like this)

**Seeley Booth **Who hasn't?

**Angela Montenegro **Don't remind me...

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **That's how I ended up in rehab! Did you know that cat's urine glows under black light?

**Wendell Bray **Too many one night stands because of Belomo's...

**Jack Hodgins **I'll drink to that!

**Colin Fisher **I'm pretty sure it started my depression spiral.

**Daisy Wick **The last time we drank Belomo's, Lance peed his pants! ! ! ;) ;) ;)

**Lance Sweets **Daisy! Was that 'never ever mentioning it again ever'? D:

**Daisy Wick **Oopsie! ! ! :D :D

**Jack Hodgins **BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

**Lance Sweets **Oh, go away.

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **Corpses burp now?

**Jack Hodgins **Yup. SO awesome.

**Wendell Bray **Dude! Seriously?

**Lance Sweets **OMG, that's totally ninja!

**Arastoo Vaziri **That is pretty cool! xD

**Colin Fisher **Though everything in life is pretty meaningless, I'm going to have to agree. Awesome.

**Angela Montenegro **Men. *facepalm*

(**Camille Saroyan**, **Daisy Wick**, **Caroline Julian **and **47 **friends like this)

* * *

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **to **Temperance Brennan**: Jimmy Paige is a better musician than Jimi Hendrix - that's a fact! Also, Jimi Hendrix's birth name was Johnny! He didn't even belong in the category of 'Famous Jameses'!

**Temperance Brennan **I don't know who those people are, but that was not at all relevant to the victim's perimortem fractures.

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **But Jimmy Page is ALWAYS relevant...

**Temperance Brennan **Get back to work, Mr Nigel-Murray.

**Vincent Nigel-Murry **Very well. Though perhaps it would interest you to know that polar bears are left-handed?

**Temperance Brennan **I would be more interested in the perimortem fractures, Mr Nigel-Murray. Now, please.

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **But, Dr Brennan!

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **... Dr Brennan?

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **... Almonds are members of the peach family!

**Vincent Nigel-Murray** Oh, forget it. :(

(**Jack Hodgins **and **6 **friends like this)

* * *

**Camille Saroyan **to **Lance Sweets**: Can I make an appointment? 2:30 this afternoon?

**Lance Sweets **Yes! They all come crawling back eventually... :D

**Camille Saroyan **... Don't ruin it, Sweets.

**Lance Sweets **Right. Sorry. My bad.

(**Camille Saroyan **and **2 **friends like this)

* * *

**Lance Sweets **to **Camille Saroyan**: Let things play themselves out. It'll be fine. :)

**Camille Saroyan **And I should trust you because...?

**Lance Sweets **I sponsor a water buffalo in the Philippines!

**Camille Saroyan **Oh, of course. How silly of me, that's EXACTLY the same as having a teenage daughter.

**Lance Sweets **Hey now, Daisy the water buffalo has shown great progress since I started sponsoring her!

**Daisy Wick **You named the water buffalo after me? ? ? You are so sweet! ! ! ! :D :D

**Lance Sweets **:D

**Jack Hodgins **Yeah, I always did think you look like a water buffalo... :P

**Daisy Wick **What? ? ?

**Daisy Wick **...

**Daisy Wick **LANCE SWEETS, ARE YOU CALLING ME FAT ? ! ? ! ? ! ? ! ! ! !

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

* * *

**Lance Sweets **to **Jack Hodgins**: I hate you.

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **Love you too, dude. Have fun taking care of your water buffalo. ;)

**Daisy Wick **YOU ARE SO DEAD, LANCE! ! ! YOU HAVE NO IDEA! ! !

**(Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Lance Sweets ***gulp* O_O

* * *

**Seeley Booth **Harriet... was a spy? You've got to be joking.

(**65 **friends like this)

**Angela Montenegro **Wait, seriously?

**Wendell Bray **That's hilarious!

**Lance Sweets **Who else LOVED that book?

(**12 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **No way, dude, the movie was better.

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **Blasphemy!

(**31 **friends like this)

**Temperance Brennan **I... am confused.

**Angela Montenegro **I'll PM you, sweetie.

**Temperance Brennan **Yowza!

**Angela Montenegro **Um...?

**Seeley Booth **Long story, Ange...

**(24 **friends like this)

* * *

**Camille Saroyan **to **Michelle Welton**: Go Hagfish!

(**Michelle Welton **likes this)

**Michelle Welton **Thanks, Cam. I'm gonna make you proud! :)

**Camille Saroyan **I know you will. :)

**(Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **Hooray!

**Camille Saroyan **... You killed the moment, Sweets. Go gloat somewhere else.

(**Michelle Welton **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **:(

**(Jack Hodgins **and **Camille Saroyan **like this)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **to **Camille Saroyan**: You're actually writing her essay? Tsk tsk.

**Michelle Welton **Whose essay?

**Camille Saroyan **Uh, no one's essay, Michelle! Just someone from work. Ahem. Yes.

**Michelle Welton **O-kay...

* * *

**Camille Saroyan **to **Jack Hodgins**: Really? You think that by 'keep it on the DL' I meant 'post it all over Facebook'?

**Jack Hodgins **You're a baaad person :P

**Camille Saroyan **I am not! I'm a good mother!

**Jack Hodgins **Whatever, "Mom" :P

**Camille Saroyan ***headdesk*

* * *

**Seeley Booth **is not attending **HODGINS AND ANGELA'S SUPER BIG SURPRISE ANNOUNCEMENT GATHERING!**

**Jack Hodgins **Dislike!

**Seeley Booth ** Sorry, man. You'll have to let me know the news on Monday - I have some... pressing FBI business to attend to.

**Temperance Brennan **Tell Hannah I say, 'Welcome home'!

(**51 **friends like this)

**Seeley Booth **Bones! *facepalm*

**Jack Hodgins **Dude, uncool.

**Angela Montenegro ***shakes head sadly*

**Seeley Booth **Oh, whatever. Just go to your announcement thing already.

**Jack Hodgins **Fine. We will. WITHOUT YOU.

**Angela Montenegro **You tell him, Hodgie.

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **Drum roll please... **Angela Montenegro **is pregnant!

(**118 **friends like this)

**Temperance Brennan **What a surprise!

**Lance Sweets **Whoa! I did NOT see that coming!

**Camille Saroyan **What great news to be hearing for the first time tonight!

**Angela Montenegro **... *facepalm*

**Jack Hodgins **You told them? D:

**Temperance Brennan **She did not.

**Lance Sweets **Nope!

**Camille Saroyan **No way, José!

**Angela Montenegro **... Little bit.

**Jack Hodgins **ANGIE!

**Angela Montenegro **I'm sorry, baby! But I didn't tell anyone else!

**Wendell Bray **Except for me...

**Caroline Julian **And me, cherie.

**Clark Edison **You told me, even though I begged you not to.

**Daisy Wick **He he, even I knew! ! ! ! Lance told me! ! ! :D :D :D

**Jack Hodgins **...

**Angela Montenegro **Oops?

(**79 **friends like this)

* * *

**Lance Sweets **To the Hodgins family! :)

(**Jack Hodgins**, **Angela Montenegro **and **82 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **Aww :D

**Angela Montenegro **Thanks, you guys!

**Lance Sweets **I believe a group hug is in order!

**Lance Sweets ***hug*

**Camille Saroyan ***hug* :)

**Vincent Nigel-Murray ***hug* Did you know that an ant always falls over on its right side when intoxicated?

**Angela Montenegro ***hug*!

**Jack Hodgins ***hug* :D

**Temperance Brennan **... I still don't know what that means.

(**34 **friends like this)

* * *

**A/N: 194 reviews? For my insanity? Thank you all so much for taking the time to review, and I hope you'll continue to do so – they really do make my day a little brighter! :D**

**Anyway, hope you enjoyed this chapter, please do let me know!**

**Peace,**

**-Ellie :)**


	8. The Twisted Bones in the Melted Truck

**A/N: Hey everyone! I recently had an idea for a piece of original piece of fiction, so I've been writing that like crazy. But don't worry, I haven't forgot about this story! :D  
This chapter is The Twisted Bones in the Melted Truck – I hope you all enjoy it!

* * *

**

**Seeley Booth **BOOM goes the car. We have a case.

(**Temperance Brennan **and **Jack Hodgins **like this)

**Jack Hodgins **BANG!

**Angela Montenegro **POW!

**Camille Saroyan **WHIZZ!

**Wendell Bray **BAM!

**Lance Sweets **QUACK!

**Seeley Booth **...

**Jack Hodgins **... WTF?

(**82 **friends like this)

* * *

**Hannah Burley **to **Seeley Booth**: Sorry for ruining that photo of you and Parker, Seeley. :/

**Seeley Booth **Don't worry about it. He's gonna love you. :)

**Daisy Wick **SMASHED PHOTO = SYMBOLISM! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **Oh, for the love of God...

**Daisy Wick **See you at work, Agent Booth! ! ! ! ! :D :D

**Seeley Booth **Kill.

**Seeley Booth **Me.

**Seeley Booth **Now.

(**Jack Hodgins **and **47 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **Huh? ? ? :/ :/

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **OMG MELTED BONES! :D I LOVE MY JOB!

**Angela Montenegro **I am going to forcibly pry the 'caps lock' button off of your computer.

(**15 **friends like this)

**Temperance Brennan **Bones do not melt, Dr Hodgins.

**Jack Hodgins **They do now!

**Temperance Brennan **The laws of chemistry have not changed.

**Jack Hodgins **Chemistry, schemistry! The bones look like a grilled cheese sandwich! :D

**Temperance Brennan **... They in no way resemble such a thing.

(**Daisy Wick **and **2 **friends like this)

**Angela Montenegro **Sigh...

(**51 **friends like this)

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Camille Saroyan**: Daisy can has liquid nitrogen? ? ? ? ? :D :D :D :D :D

**Camille Saroyan **No.

(**109 **friends like this)

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Camille Saroyan**: Please? ? ? ? ? :D :D :D

**Camille Saroyan **... No.

**Daisy Wick **:( :( :( :( :( :( ! ! ! ! ! ! !

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Camille Saroyan**: Preeettyyy please? ? ? ? *puppy dog eyes*

**Camille Saroyan **... Fine.

**Daisy Wick **E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! :D :D :D

**Angela Montenegro **Both of my eardrums just burst... from looking at your comment. ... I didn't think that was even possible.

(**67 **friends like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **to **Angela Montenegro**: Thanks for making me happy :)

**Angela Montenegro **You got it!

**Daisy Wick **Are you two having sex? ? ? ? ? ? ? ;) ;) ;) ;)

**Clark Edison ***chokes*

**Jack Hodgins **WHAT?

**Hannah Burley **^ what he said.

(**7 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **Daisy is sorry. Please don't kill her.

**Daisy Wick **Don't tell me how I'm feeling, Lance! ! ! ! ! !

**Wendell Bray **But isn't that, like, his job?

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **Dammit, Sweets, don't they have mental institutions for people like her?

(**Jack Hodgins **and **3 **friends like this)

**Zack Addy **I take offence at the above comment.

**Seeley Booth **...

**Jack Hodgins **... Weeeelll, this is awkward...

(**34 **friends like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **to **Lance Sweets**: Can ya swing by my office? I need your advice on a personal matter.

**Lance Sweets **This is a rare moment! On my way! :D :D

**Seeley Booth **... Every time, Sweets. You make it weird.

**Lance Sweets **... :(

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Jack Hodgins**: The victim was covered in magnesium oxide! ! ! ! :D :D :D :D

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **Not too bad, rookie.

**Daisy Wick **YAY! ! ! ! ! ! :D :D :D :D

**Daisy Wick **But *I* thought of it first, just if anyone from the FBI asks! ! ! ! ;) ;) ;)

**Jack Hodgins **Nope.

**Daisy Wick **Huh? ? ? ? :/ :/ :/

**Jack Hodgins **King of the Lab, baby. All other points are null and void.

**Daisy Wick **I don't know what that means! ! ! ? ? ? D: D: D:

(**Temperance Brennan **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **I own you. You are my serf.

**Jack Hodgins **And I am one BAMF king. Just sayin'.

(**Jack Hodgins **and **Angela Montenegro **like this)

**Daisy Wick **Waaahh! ! ! :( :( :(

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Temperance Brennan**: You'll put in a good word for me at my FBI psych evaluation, won't you? ? ? ? ? ? ? :) :) :) :)

**Temperance Brennan **It's a psych evaluation, Miss Wick. I am no help to you there.

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **That's true... :( :( :( ! ! !

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Camille Saroyan**: Oh my GOD, the wife TOTALLY torched the victim! ! ! ! ! !

**Camille Saroyan **...

**Wendell Bray **... O_O

**Angela Montenegro **...

**Temperance Brennan **... That is a massive assumption, Miss Wick.

**Daisy Wick **Sorry, Dr Brennan! ! I was going with my gut - it's an FBI thing! ! ! ! ;) ;) ;)

**Seeley Booth ***facepalm*

**Caroline Julian **I feel ashamed to represent the FBI right now.

(**Seeley Booth **and **32 **friends like this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **was once placed in detention for calling her science teacher a fool.

(**92 **friends like this)

**Angela Montenegro **Oh, sweetie, you can't do that...

**Jack Hodgins **One time, I got detention for spiking the teachers' lounge coffee pot with pure alcohol. It was awesome!

**Wendell Bray **Dude! *high fives*

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **I got detention for streaking on school property Freshman year.

**Angela Montenegro **...

**Jack Hodgins **BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

**Jack Hodgins **Wait, now I'm picturing you naked! EW! EW! GROSS!

**Angela Montenegro **Now I am too! WHY would you say that, Jack? D:

**Camille Saroyan **You're all disgusting.

**Seeley Booth **Someone pass me the brain bleach.

(**Clark Edison **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **Hey! :(

**Daisy Wick **Don't mind them, Lancelot! ! ! ! I think it's sexy! ! ! :D :D :D

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Angela Montenegro **... Oh, God. I'm going to vomit. And the baby has nothing to do with it.

(**47 **friends like this)

**Clark Edison **Way ahead of you. *gags*

**Lance Sweets **:(

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **to **Seeley Booth**: One of the teenage delinquents in detention referred to me as "cool".

(**14 **friends like this)

**Seeley Booth **Not really much help in terms of catching our murderer, but that's great, Bones.

**Daisy Wick **I think you're cool too, Dr Brennan! ! ! ! !

**Wendell Bray **Coolest forensic anthropologist I know :)

**Arastoo Vaziri **I concur wholeheartedly!

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **I agree. Did you know that there are 18 species of penguin?

**Seeley Booth **... Suck ups.

(**21 **friends like this)

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Jack Hodgins**: Experiment time? ? ? :D :D :D

**Jack Hodgins **Pssh, with you? Nah.

**Daisy Wick **But it was my idea! ! You have to let me help! ! !

**Daisy Wick **... Please? ?

**Daisy Wick **Pretty please ? ! ? ! ?

**Daisy Wick **... Your Highness? ? ? ?

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **Well, when you put it like that...

**Daisy Wick **YAY! ! ! ! :D :D :D :D

**Camille Saroyan **... Oh, God. I'm going to take a long lunch.

(**Jack Hodgins **and **Angela Montenegro **like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **to **Hannah Burley**: I want you to meet Parker.

**Hannah Burley **Not so good with kids...

**Seeley Booth **He'll love you. :)

**Hannah Burley **:)

**Daisy Wick **NO HE WON'T! ! ! ! !

**Seeley Booth **All right, that's it. I've threatened it before, but you leave me no choice, Daisy.

**Daisy Wick **Eeek! :O :O :O :O

* * *

**Lance Sweets **to **Seeley Booth**: ... I can't believe you just did that to my girlfriend!

**Seeley Booth **She got what was coming to her.

**Lance Sweets **It's a little harsh, don't you think?

**Seeley Booth **Not harsh enough, actually.

**Lance Sweets ***sigh*... Please re-add Daisy on Facebook. She's crying hysterically.

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **Nah.

**Lance Sweets **I'll buy you coffee for a month.

**Seeley Booth **... Throw a slice of pie in there, and you've got yourself a deal.

**Lance Sweets **But that's like six dollars a - never mind. Fine. The things I do for love... *headdesk*

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **and **Daisy Wick **are now friends.

(**Daisy Wick **and **Lance Sweets **like this)

**Daisy Wick **YAY! ! ! ! Let's never fight again, Agent Booth! ! ! ! :D :D

**Daisy Wick ***hug attack* ! ! ! !

**Seeley Booth **... That better be some damn good pie, Sweets.

**Daisy Wick **Huh? ? ?

**Lance Sweets **Uh... nothing, Daisy!

**Daisy Wick **Oh, okay! ! ! ! :D :D

* * *

**Lance Sweets **"Don't you call me a mindless philosopher, you overweight glob of grease!"

(**Jack Hodgins**, **Colin Fisher **and **63 **friends like this)

**Wendell Bray **Star Wars! 8D

**Jack Hodgins **C3PO was the man!

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Wendell Bray **Nah, R2D2 all the way.

**Jack Hodgins **... I just lost so much respect for you.

(**Lance Sweets **and **4 **friends like this)

**Colin Fisher **Those movies are the one thing in life I do not find depressing.

**Arastoo Vaziri **They're awesome! :)

**Daisy Wick **AAAARRRHHHHHUUUNNNNGGHHH! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

**Arastoo Vaziri **...

**Wendell Bray **O_O

**Jack Hodgins **Did someone forget to take their medicine today?

**Lance Sweets **No, Hodgins! She's quoting Chewbacca! xD

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **I love you, my Star Warrior! ! ! ! :D :D :D

**Lance Sweets **Amazing she is, the girlfriend I have. ;)

**Jack Hodgins **... Nerds.

(**75 **friends like this)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **just got shot. Thanks, **Daisy Wick**.

**Daisy Wick **You're welcome! ! ! :D :D

**Angela Montenegro **... Wait, seriously?

**Daisy Wick **We forgot to account for Newton's Third Law of Motion - for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction! ! ! ! :D :D :D

**Angela Montenegro **So, you shot my husband because Isaac Newton told you to?

**Temperance Brennan **Isaac Newton is dead, Angela. He could not tell Miss Wick anything.

**Angela Montenegro **... *facepalm*

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Jack Hodgins**: Our experiment was a success! ! ! Don't you feel all warm and fuzzy inside? ? :D :D :D

**Jack Hodgins **I'm kind of feeling INTENSE AGONY inside, given that you shot me!

**Daisy Wick **Oopsies! ! :D :D

**Jack Hodgins **... Wait, why are you even on Facebook? GET ME THAT FIRST AID KIT NOW, SERF.

**Daisy Wick **My bad! ! ! :D :D :D

**Camille Saroyan **Currently sitting in the Royal Diner, watching this unfold. This is the best long lunch I've ever had.

(**Angela Montenegro **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **... I hate you both.

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Lance Sweets**: You know I love you, right, baby? ? ? :D :D

**Lance Sweets **Yes... What are you driving at, Miss Daisy?

**Daisy Wick **Who, me? ? ? Nothing! ! !

**Lance Sweets **Daisy...

**Daisy Wick **What's on the psych evaluation test? ! ? ! ? !

**Lance Sweets **I'm not helping you cheat! :O

**Daisy Wick **... Please? ? ?

**Lance Sweets **Nope. Sorry.

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Lance Sweets**: Pretty please? ! ?

**Lance Sweets **... No. It wouldn't be ethical!

**Daisy Wick ***cries* ! !

**Lance Sweets **Don't cry! D:

**Daisy Wick ***cries river of tears because she's going to lose her dream job because her boyfriend doesn't love her and then the river gets so big that all the low-lying countries of the world are flooded and no one has any food and global warming happens faster and the North Pole's ice caps melt and all the baby polar bears die* ! ! ! !

**Lance Sweets **... O_O

**Lance Sweets **... Fine, I'll give you some advice, but I can't tell you the answers. For the polar bears.

**Daisy Wick **YAY! ! ! I love you! ! ! You're saving so many cute polar bears, Lancelot! ! ! You're a hero! ! ! *kisses*

**Lance Sweets **Stupid cute polar bears... *grumbles*

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

* * *

**Hannah Burley**, **Temperance Brennan **and **20 **other friends are now friends with **Parker Booth**.

**Seeley Booth **Parker, when did you get Facebook?

**Parker Booth **Hannah made it for me :D :D Isn't it cool? :D :D

**Seeley Booth **Hmm...

**Hannah Burley **It was Facebook or camel racing, Seeley, and we couldn't find a camel on such short notice ;)

(**Parker Booth **likes this)

**Parker Booth **Hahahahaha :D :D Hannah is funny :D :D

**Hannah Burley **So are you! :P

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **:D

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **to **Seeley Booth**: You, Parker and Hannah can come over and swim any time you like. I know how much Parker loves the pool.

(**Parker Booth **likes this)

**Parker Booth **YAY :D :D Hahahaha :D :D

**Seeley Booth **Great, thanks Bones! :)

**Temperance Brennan **... You're welcome.

**Seeley Booth **...?

**Jack Hodgins **Hey, how come you never invite me over to your pool?

**Temperance Brennan **...

**Angela Montenegro **Because no one likes you, Hodgie.

**Jack Hodgins **Whatever. You all secretly worship the ground I walk on.

**Seeley Booth **...

**Lance Sweets **... This just got awkward real fast...

(**58 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **:/

* * *

**Lance Sweets **to **Daisy Wick**: We're not gonna cheat, are we?

**Daisy Wick **Of course not! ! ! :D :D :D

**Lance Sweets **I'm just... helping out a colleague?

**Daisy Wick **Absolutely! ! ! ;) ;)

**Lance Sweets** Okay, in that case: what's your favourite colour?

**Jack Hodgins **You don't know your girlfriend's favourite colour? TSK TSK!

**Lance Sweets **Go away, Hodgins.

(**Angela Montenegro **and **71 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **Anything in the 630 to 740 nanometer range! ! ! :D :D

**Lance Sweets **...?

**Daisy Wick **Red! ! ! :D :D

**Lance Sweets **...

**Daisy Wick **EEP! ! ! D: D: Um... I mean, green? ?

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **YAY! ! ! :D

**Lance Sweets **Favourite number?

**Daisy Wick **Either of Feigenbaum's constants! !

**Daisy Wick **Though I think the question you need is 'what's your favourite *numeral*?', baby! ! ! :D :D :D

**Lance Sweets **... *facepalm* This might take a while...

(**12 **friends like this)

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Lance Sweets**: You know why your name is Sweets? ? ? Because you're so sweet! ! ! :D :D :D

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **Aww! Though not as sweet as my Miss Daisy! ;)

**Daisy Wick **I love you, Lancelot! ! ! :D :D

**Lance Sweets **Love you more. :D

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **Mwah! X3

**Lance Sweets **Rawr ;)

**Angela Montenegro **... I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.

(**Clark Edison **and **60 **friends like this)

* * *

**Daisy Wick **passed her psychological evaluation! ! ! ! :D :D :D

(**Lance Sweets **and **8 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **So, you're officially crazy now?

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **No, I'm sane! ! And able to work on my own! ! :P :P

**Jack Hodgins **BAHAHAHAHA. You, sane? Nah.

**Angela Montenegro **I won't be too quick to judge, Hodgie. Someone who starts dancing with joy when they see a bucket of magnets is definitely my definition of crazy...

(**32 **friends like this)

**Temperance Brennan **That is an absurd and totally useless qualification, Miss Wick.

**Seeley Booth **Shot down by Bones. Let's see how long it takes Daisy to crumple and burn the qualification her mentor doesn't approve of...

(**Jack Hodgins **and **18 **friends like this)

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Lance Sweets**: When seen through your eyes, psychology can be fascinating! ! ! ! !

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **;)

**Temperance Brennan **I would ask you to please clean up any mess you make if you plan on having intercourse on the bone room's floor again.

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Camille Saroyan **... Again? D:

(**Angela Montenegro **and **67 **friends like this)

**Clark Edison ***bashes head off wall*

* * *

**Parker Booth **to **Temperance Brennan**: Which animal farts the most? :D :D

**Temperance Brennan **The termite.

(**Parker Booth **and **Seeley Booth **like this)

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **Ah! Beat me to it there, I see. I - ah - never mind. I'll just... be leaving...

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Parker Booth **You're cool! ! :D :D

**Hannah Burley **She's very cool. :)

(**Parker Booth **likes this)

**Temperance Brennan **Thank you, though I was already aware of the fact.

(**Seeley Booth **and **94 **friends like this)

* * *

**Parker Booth** My new favourite flavour of ice cream is chocolate! :D :D

(**Hannah Burley **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **SYMBOLISM! ! ! !

**Seeley Booth **... *facepalm*

**Lance Sweets **Um, Daisy? Perhaps you should leave the psychological insights to me.

(**47 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **Haha, burn!

**Lance Sweets **Whatever, Hodgins. Nobody likes you!

(**Angela Montenegro **and **55 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **Pssh, that's not true!

**Jack Hodgins **Am I right? :P

**Jack Hodgins **... Hello?

**Jack Hodgins **... Anybody?

**Jack Hodgins **... :(

* * *

**A/N: Ta da! Love it? Hate it? Feel free to make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside and leave me a review! :D**

**OH, and I have a question for you all. As you know, next episode is the beautiful Doctor in the Photo and I have to ask you how I should approach it:**

**a) Do what I normally do, and fill it with insanity and humour**

**b) Treat it a little more solemnly **

**c) Skip over the chapter altogether. **

**Whatever you guys want to do is cool with me – please do let me know!**

**Peace,**

**-Ellie :) **


	9. The Doctor in the Photo

**A/N: Well, here it is. The thing that's been causing me to tear my hair out for the past two weeks – I hope it was vaguely worth it! :P Now, I tried to mix some humour in with the serious, but I found towards the end that I couldn't even bear to change the beautiful dialogue – so take it as more of a dramatic recount of what happened during the episode. I really couldn't see myself improving what was already perfect! Enjoy :)

* * *

**

**Temperance Brennan **created an event: **BRENNAN'S SUPER FUN DINNER PARTY! - COUPLES ONLY! **

**Angela Montenegro **... Okay, Jack. It's pretty glaringly obvious you made this.

(**7 **friends like that)

**Jack Hodgins **What the - how did you KNOW? :O

**Angela Montenegro **Female intuition.

(**Camille Saroyan **and **3 **friends like this)

**Temperance Brennan **There is no such thing, Angela. Also, Dr Hodgins, please refrain from sneaking into my office to wreak havoc on my Facebook page.

**Camille Saroyan **... Wait a second, that's why you were lurking near her office? You said you were getting some paperwork!

(**Angela Montenegro **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **Um...

**Camille Saroyan **Of course. It would be ludicrous to even think of you doing work...

(**Jack Hodgins **and **Angela Montenegro **like this)

**Jack Hodgins **I'm glad we understand each other! :D

**Camille Saroyan **... *facepalm*

**Daisy Wick **Lance and I are a couple! ! ! Are we invited? ? ? :D :D

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **...

**Hannah Burley **...

**Angela Montenegro **...

**Jack Hodgins **... Awkward.

(**14 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **:( :( :( :( ! ! ! !

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Lance Sweets**: We don't need them! ! ! Let's have our own dinner party! ! !

**Lance Sweets **Karaoke and Mongolian barbecue? ;)

**Daisy Wick **You betcha! ! ! !

**Jack Hodgins **You guys are just too cool.

**Daisy Wick **We know! ! ! ! :D :D :D

**Lance Sweets **... Um, she doesn't really get sarcasm. We're working on it.

**Jack Hodgins **Of course she doesn't... You have a good night, BunBun. :P

**Lance Sweets **Whatever.

**Lance Sweets **LET THAT NICKNAME DIE!

**Jack Hodgins **Nah :)

**Lance Sweets ***headdesk*

* * *

**Hannah Burley **is having a lovely meal at **Temperance Brennan**'s house. :)

(**Seeley Booth **and **3 **friends like this)

**Seeley Booth **Winner winner chicken dinner! ;)

**Angela Montenegro **The chicken bone trick was... pretty gross, but definitely cool.

**Temperance Brennan **You're all welcome. I am a very skilled cook.

(**4 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **Amen to that!

**Camille Saroyan **Hate to break up this little gathering (why are you all on Facebook if you're together, anyway?), but someone got murdered.

**Angela Montenegro **Dislike :/

**Seeley Booth **And I just ate...

**Jack Hodgins **THUNDERBIRDS ARE GO!

**Temperance Brennan **I don't know what that means.

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **YAY! TREE RING ANALYSIS TIME! :D

**Angela Montenegro **At least you've stopped talking about bugs, I guess...

**Jack Hodgins **I love you too, Angie! :D

* * *

**Seeley Booth **to **Temperance Brennan**: So, the victim is about... the same height and weight as you, right Bones?

**Temperance Brennan **I... Yes, that is congruent with our findings thus far.

**Jack Hodgins **Cree-eepy...

**Seeley Booth **Go back to your tree, Hodgins.

(**42 **friends like this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **Oh.

**Seeley Booth **Oh... what?

**Temperance Brennan **Nothing.

**Seeley Booth **Alrighty then...

**Angela Montenegro **Are you okay, sweetie?

**Temperance Brennan **Yes, I'm fine...

**Angela Montenegro **:/

* * *

**Angela Montenegro **Needs pastries. A lot of pastries.

**Jack Hodgins **Left you a Danish in your office :)

(**Angela Montenegro **likes this)

**Angela Montenegro **This is why I married you.

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **Did you know that the average Danish is 460 kilocalories?

**Angela Montenegro **...

**Jack Hodgins **... Want me to throw that Danish away?

**Angela Montenegro **Please.

* * *

**Angela Montenegro **to **Temperance Brennan**: Lots of people like dolphins, sweetie. And millions of copies of the same piece of jewellery can be made.

(**Temperance Brennan **likes this)

**Temperance Brennan **You are making sense. Thank you, Ange.

**Angela Montenegro **Here to help. :)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **There's something funky about these leaves...

**Temperance Brennan **Do you mean funky as in a bad smell? Or music with an earthy, bluesy quality?

(**39 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **No, weird. :)

**Temperance Brennan **What's weird?

**Jack Hodgins **Never mind, I'll get Ange to PM you.

**Angela Montenegro ***facepalm* On it...

* * *

**Hannah Burley **to **Seeley Booth**: *slow claps*

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **Hey, it's a great cinematic device, okay?

**Hannah Burley **It makes you all misty :P

(**17 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **Lance always gets misty at the end of 'Legally Blonde'! ! ! ! :D :D :D

(**Seeley Booth **and **51 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **DAISY! :O

**Daisy Wick **But you do! ! When Elle starts making her valedictorian speech you start blinking back tears! ! ! :D :D

(**Jack Hodgins **and **4 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets ***headdesk*

**Jack Hodgins **Dude, it's cool, I love that movie too!

**Lance Sweets **It's awesome, right? Reese Witherspoon is such an inspiration!

**Jack Hodgins **... I was just joking. It's a total chick flick.

(**72 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **Teehee! ! !

**Lance Sweets **Let me die...

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

* * *

**Hannah Burley **to **Temperance Brennan**: Hey, a Dr Lauren Eames who fits your profile disappeared last November. I checked Bing! :D

**Temperance Brennan **She was a surgeon?

**Daisy Wick **Bing? ! ? GOOGLE IS SO MUCH BETTER! ! !

**Daisy Wick **And by 'Bing' I mean YOU, and by 'Google' I mean Dr Brennan! ! ! !

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Hannah Burley **...

**Lance Sweets **... I am so sorry. *facepalm*

**Hannah Burley **Um, anyway... Yes, she was a surgeon. :)

**Temperance Brennan **But no investigation was launched? How can that be?

**Hannah Burley **Single, no kids, no one to miss her, I guess.

**Temperance Brennan **... Oh.

**Hannah Burley **Huh? Are you okay?

**Hannah Burley **Temperance? :/

* * *

**Seeley Booth **to **Temperance Brennan**: Says here the victim overworked her interns - like you and your squinterns, huh Bones? ;)

**Temperance Brennan **I... appreciate my interns.

(**Wendell Bray**, **Daisy Wick **and **4 **friends like this)

**Wendell Bray **You sure do! :)

**Daisy Wick **YAY! ! ! ! ! :D :D :D

**Arastoo Vaziri **You are very kind, Dr Brennan. :)

**Clark Edison **I second that. A great employer.

**Colin Fisher **I guess I feel a little less like I've been sucked up into a black hole when I'm at work. A little. I guess.

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **Did you know that more than 10 people are killed by vending machines per year?

**Seeley Booth **... You people have no lives.

(**88 **friends like this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **posted a **photo**.

(**2 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **She looks nice! A friend of yours, Dr Brennan? :)

**Seeley Booth **That's the murder victim, Sweets.

**Lance Sweets **Oh, God... I'm sorry! D:

**Temperance Brennan **Does she remind you of anyone?

**Seeley Booth **No one I know. Why?

**Temperance Brennan **...

* * *

**Seeley Booth **has sent you a **message**.

**Seeley Booth **to **Temperance Brennan**: Hey, Bones - are you okay?

**Temperance Brennan **I... Yes, I am fine.

**Seeley Booth **Okay, if you're sure...

**Temperance Brennan **Are you quite certain that Dr Eames doesn't resemble anyone you know?

**Seeley Booth **Definitely not. Why? Who should I be seeing?

**Temperance Brennan **Oh... I... Never mind.

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **is now friends with **Micah**.

(**Temperance Brennan **likes this)

**Temperance Brennan **Why do you have no last name?

**Micah **Women like men of mystery. Not having a last name gives me a sense of mystery. Ergo ipso facto colombo oreo -

**Temperance Brennan **Not all of that is real Latin, Micah.

**Micah **Wasn't supposed to be, Doc ;)

**Temperance Brennan **You are rather amusing.

(**Micah **likes this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan** finds the similarities between her voice and the victim's disconcerting.

**Micah **Should you be listening to that, Doc?

**Temperance Brennan** I have to, Micah - she's exactly like me. She is me.

**Micah **Nuh uh. She's her, you're you. You're alive and she's dead. Ergo ipso facto colombo oreo...

**Temperance Brennan **Micah, you cannot use those words purely because they sound like Latin.

**Micah **Sure I can :P

**Temperance Brennan **Using the expression ':P' is grammatically incorrect, you know.

* * *

**Lance Sweets **to **Temperance Brennan**: You're distressed because you're overidentifying with the victim. Would you like to make an appointment to talk about it...?

**Temperance Brennan **Not particularly, no.

**Lance Sweets **I - I don't... Okay.

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Lance Sweets**: Is Dr Brennan okay? ? ? :/ :/ :/

**Lance Sweets **I - Yes, she's fine. Don't worry, Miss Daisy.

**Daisy Wick **Okay! ! Phew! ! ! :D :D

**Angela Montenegro **Guys, could you *be* more obvious? This is what Facebook mail is for!

(**2 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **Please, I set up Dr Brennan's Facebook account! ! She has no idea what any of this means! ! :P :P

**Angela Montenegro **... I see your point.

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **has just sent you a **message**.

**Temperance Brennan** to **Seeley Booth**: I wish you hadn't got Sweets to come talk to me.

**Seeley Booth **Can ya blame me? I'm a meddlesome kind of a guy. ;)

**Temperance Brennan **That is very true.

**Seeley Booth **... Hey, what was going on with you today? It's not like you to just pick up something that could be evidence.

**Temperance Brennan **I... I am not sure as to why I did it.

**Temperance Brennan **I am... sorry.

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **People assume that when you're alone, you must be lonely.

**Daisy Wick **Aren't you? ? ?

**Angela Montenegro **Oh my God, Daisy... *facepalm*

**Lance Sweets **Okay, Daisy, no more Facebook for today.

**Lance Sweets **... Or ever.

(**Angela Montenegro **and **67 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **:O :O :O ! ! !

**Temperance Brennan **That statement was erroneous, Miss Wick.

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **to **Micah**: Do you think I've gone nuts, Micah?

**Micah **Nah. Sometimes our brains need to tell us things - like intuition.

**Temperance Brennan **I don't believe in intuition.

**Micah **That's why your brain is talking so loudly ;)

**Temperance Brennan **Although the brain cannot physically speak, I think I grasp what you are saying.

(**Micah **likes this)

**Micah **:)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **is not happy!

(**Daisy Wick **and **Seeley Booth **like this)

**Angela Montenegro **Aw, why not, Hodgie?

**Jack Hodgins **Booth and Brennan stuck me with their bill!

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **Heh heh XD

**Camille Saroyan **Dr Hodgins, you are rich - how is this even a problem for you?

**Jack Hodgins **It's an inconvenience!

**Camille Saroyan ***facepalm* ... Get back to work.

**Jack Hodgins **But -

**Camille Saroyan **NOW.

**Jack Hodgins **Yes ma'am. Funky leaves here I come!

* * *

**Temperance Brennan** to **Seeley Booth**: The victim's T score was 2, ergo ipso facto colombo oreo, your accusations are incorrect!

**Seeley Booth **What? Bones, that's not real Latin! And anyway, this just proves the victim wasn't a *habitual* user!

**Hannah Burley **Please stop arguing! :(

(**Angela Montenegro **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **We're not arguing!

**Hannah Burley **Psht, yes you are. You may not be shouting in caps lock, but I've never seen exclamation marks look so aggressive.

**Angela Montenegro **Amen to that! *high fives*

* * *

**Seeley Booth **has sent you a **message**.

**Seeley Booth **Why are you taking this so personally, Bones? It's not like you're the one being accused of being a drug addict.

**Temperance Brennan **I... I haven't slept in a couple of nights. I... I am just very tired, that's all.

**Temperance Brennan **I - I apologise.

**Seeley Booth **... :/

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **to **Temperance Brennan**: Solution turned purple. It's heroin. Sorry, Dr B...

**Temperance Brennan **It could very easily be morphine! It makes much more sense if it's morphine.

**Camille Saroyan **But why would the victim buy heroin if she had access to morphine?

**Camille Saroyan **... Dr Brennan?

**Camille Saroyan **... Okay then...

**Jack Hodgins **:/

* * *

**Micah **to **Temperance Brennan**: Okay, Doc, by the power vested in me by the Jeffersonian Institution, I hereby declare you sleep deprived.

**Micah **Called you a cab, it's outside.

**Temperance Brennan **Do you really have that power?

**Micah **I couldn't tell you, Doc. If I did, it'd ruin my sense of mystery.

**Temperance Brennan **I fail to see how you are the only person I always understand. With other people... I sometimes just hear... noise. Not with you.

**Micah **Didn't you know? I speak the secret language of the Jeffersonian. ;)

(**Temperance Brennan **likes this)

**Micah **Now, how about that cab, huh?

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **to **Lance Sweets**: Are you suggesting that I am behaving irrationally, like Dr Eames? Because you want to stab me?

**Lance Sweets **Of course not, Dr Brennan. You are one of my closest friends.

**Lance Sweets **It's important to know that you're not alone in this world, Dr Brennan. Far from it, in fact.

**Lance Sweets **And that's what makes you very different from Dr Lauren Eames.

**Temperance Brennan **...

**Temperance Brennan **I will consider what you have said.

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **Thank you.

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **is now friends with **Chris Markham**.

**Camille Saroyan **Um, Dr Brennan? Should you be adding suspects while the case is still open?

* * *

**Seeley Booth **to **Camille Saroyan**: Let this one go, Cam.

**Camille Saroyan **I... I... okay.

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **to **Chris Markham**: I... am very sorry for your loss.

**Chris Markham **Appreciate it. We would've been so good together. It wasn't my loss, it was hers - but it's just that I don't see what she had to lose.

**Temperance Brennan **Nothing. She had nothing to lose. It was her biggest regret - though it is impossible for her to still be thinking, as she is deceased... she... would want you to know that.

(**Chris Markham **likes this)

**Chris Markham **Thank you.

* * *

**Micah **to **Temperance Brennan**: Seems to me you can't trust a brain that can't make its mind up about something as basic as which way is up.

(**Temperance Brennan **likes this)

**Micah **There's no such thing as objectivity - we're only trying to interpret signals from the universe, Doc. And mostly failing.

**Temperance Brennan **Signals from the universe?

**Micah **Dim, shaky signals that only hint at the complexity of a universe that we cannot begin to comprehend.

**Micah **... That's what the lecturer said, anyway. Just an idea.

**Temperance Brennan **... Perhaps that lecturer was... more intelligent than most. Even if the idea seems ludicrous.

(**Micah **likes this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **Signals from the universe...

**Jack Hodgins **Huh? :/

**Angela Montenegro **Sweetie, what are you talking about?

**Daisy Wick **Even though Dr Brennan and I share the same thought process, I remain stumped! ! ! :/ :/ :/

**Jack Hodgins ***facepalm*

**Lance Sweets **Is there anything you need to talk about?

**Seeley Booth **... Bones?

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **Dude! Listen to that thunder!

(**5 **friends like this)

**Camille Saroyan **It's crazy out there. Can't remember the last time DC's had a storm this bad.

**Angela Montenegro **I hope everyone has the sense to stay inside... :/

(**Jack Hodgins **and **3 **friends like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **has sent you a **message**.

**Seeley Booth **to **Temperance Brennan**: Bones, what was that? You drive over to a bad part of town in a storm, and almost get hit by a car? What were you thinking?

**Temperance Brennan **I know how Lauren Eames died, Booth.

**Seeley Booth **Wait, what?

**Temperance Brennan **After she failed to get the heart for Sam Dworsky, she was upset. She bought the heroin for the danger of it - just to feel something. She was struck by a car, hence her head wound.

**Seeley Booth **Wow, Bones. You figured that out by yourself?

**Temperance Brennan **I don't have any proof.

**Seeley Booth **I know, but I believe you. Of course I do.

**Temperance Brennan **Thank you, Booth.

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **is not Lauren Eames. The universe just turned upside down for three days.

(**Micah **and **31 **friends like this)

**Micah **You've got it, Doc.

**Lance Sweets **I'm glad to hear it, Dr Brennan :)

**Jack Hodgins **You're back, baby!

**Jack Hodgins **... Sorry about the 'baby' thing. Reflex.

(**Angela Montenegro **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **... But the universe doesn't turn upside down! ! ! :P :P

**Jack Hodgins **... Must you ruin EVERY moment?

(**76 **friends like this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **has sent you a **message**.

**Temperance Brennan **to **Seeley Booth**: I made a mistake, Booth.

**Seeley Booth **Huh? But you were right about the case, Bones.

**Temperance Brennan **Lauren Eames died with regrets. Micah says that all we get are dim, shaky signals from the universe.

**Seeley Booth **Who's this Micah guy, again?

**Temperance Brennan **He's the night watchman - though he attends a lot of lectures.

**Temperance Brennan **Lauren Eames never gave the helicopter pilot a chance, even though he offered himself to her. That was her regret.

**Temperance Brennan **I got the signal, Booth.

**Seeley Booth **Bones...

**Temperance Brennan **I don't want any regrets.

**Seeley Booth **Bones... Hannah's not a consolation prize. I love her.

**Seeley Booth **The last thing I want to do is hurt you...

**Temperance Brennan **I missed my chance. My whole universe turned upside down.

**Temperance Brennan **I can adjust.

**Seeley Booth **Are... you sure you're okay?

**Temperance **Yes. I'm fine. Alone.

* * *

**Seeley Booth **Bad day.

**Lance Sweets **Would you like to talk about it?

**Angela Montenegro **Oh my God, Sweets, he wouldn't react well to that in the best of moods...

(**Camille Saroyan **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **Touché. I withdraw the above comment.

(**3 **friends like this)

**Hannah Burley **Coming home anytime soon? I miss you.

**Seeley Booth **Yeah... I'll... I'll be there soon.

**Hannah Burley **... :/

* * *

**Temperance Brennan** to **Micah**: I listened to the universe. I felt something. ... I'm sad.

(**Micah **likes this)

**Micah **So much better than dead. Or dead inside.

**Temperance Brennan **Thank you, Micah - for everything.

**Micah **You're welcome. We all have our own sad stories to tell, Doc. Believe you me.

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **Three days. Three days for the universe to turn right side up again.

(**98 **friends like this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **posted a **photo**.

**Temperance Brennan **Dr Lauren Eames. 1976-2010.

* * *

**A/N: That's it. I hope you like it – and that I haven't horribly offended anyone or ruined the episode or some other nightmarish thing :/ Please do review with your thoughts! And we'll be back to our mindless fun with the next episode :D**

**Peace,**

**-Ellie :)**


	10. The Body in the Bag

**A/N: My friends, I am sorry to inform you... that Ellie is dead.**

**PSYCHE! I'm not really dead. I've just had a few of the most stressful weeks of my young life. Seriously, it was one thing after another - I've barely had any time for myself! I can't remember the last time I even slept properly... BUT ANYWAY. I'm sorry for the delay, and I hope this chapter will appease you somewhat. Finals are coming up, so I'll be studying which means a delay in updates... but never fear! I fully intend continuing the story. :)**

**Anywho, this episode is The Body in the Bag. Had a bit of writer's block with this chapter, so I hope you enjoy it! :D**

* * *

**Lance Sweets **Put the lime in da coconut, drink 'em both up...

(**Daisy Wick **and **37 **friends like this)

**Temperance Brennan **Wasn't that the song you were supposed to sing right before Booth was shot by that obese girl?

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **... Um, yes, Dr Brennan. But the song has many more emotional connotations.

**Daisy Wick **It's OUR song! ! ! ! :D :D :D

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Wendell Bray **But what's so romantic about limes and coconuts?

**Daisy Wick **Oh, you'd be surprised! ! ;) ;)

**Wendell Bray **O_O

**Angela Montenegro **TMI...

(**15 **friends like this)

**Seeley Booth **You need a new treadmill song. I think your office buddies are getting tired of it.

**Lance Sweets **...

**Lance Sweets **Wait... I don't... sing it out loud, do I?

**Jack Hodgins **You do. ALL the time.

**Camille Saroyan **It's getting kind of annoying...

**Daisy Wick **You even do it when we're in bed sometimes! ! :P :P

**Angela Montenegro **Oh my God, Daisy, stop talking.

(**91 **friends like this)

* * *

**Lance Sweets **to **Seeley Booth**: I whacked my head off the treadmill. I'm pretty sure I have a concussion. This is your fault.

**Seeley Booth **Nah. It was yours - you mentioned me and... you know who.

**Lance Sweets **You never answered my question. Do you still have feelings for Dr Brennan?

**Seeley Booth **SWEETS - EVERYONE CAN SEE THIS.

**Seeley Booth **And no, I don't!

**Lance Sweets **Yikes, sorry. I'll delete it.

**Lance Sweets **And I'm changing gyms.

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **WOO! Drainage party on the roof! I love my job xD

**Angela Montenegro **Be careful, Hodgie.

**Jack Hodgins **Always am ;)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **to **Seeley Booth**: Hey! Need you guys to stand clear of the drain, okay?

**Jack Hodgins **Booth?

**Jack Hodgins **... Hello?

**Jack Hodgins **Oh, okay. We're doing this now. Real mature.

**Jack Hodgins **Don't stand clear of the drain. See if I care!

* * *

**Camille Saroyan **is going to murder **Jack Hodgins**.

(**124 **friends like this)

**Angela Montenegro ***facepalm* What did he do now?

**Camille Saroyan **Splattered. With. Gooey flesh and bones. In the face.

**Clark Edison **I hate to intrude, but I trust you all scraped it into evidence bags? And didn't swallow anything? That information is vital to the case.

**Angela Montenegro ***gags*

(**3 **friends like this)

**Temperance Brennan **While I, too, am aggravated by this circumstance, I believe murdering Dr Hodgins would not be well received - especially in this line of work.

**Camille Saroyan **It's Dr Hodgins. I think they'll make an exception.

**Temperance Brennan **That does seem plausible...

**Jack Hodgins **Hey! I'm right here!

**Camille Saroyan **And your point being...?

**Jack Hodgins **You're just being rude now. I said I was sorry!

**Camille Saroyan **Dr Hodgins, my hair smells like a 3-day-old corpse. 'Sorry' doesn't quite cut it.

(**Angela Montenegro **and **58 **friends like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **to **Jack Hodgins**: I really am going to shoot you this time. That suit was new.

**Jack Hodgins **Yeesh! What is it, 'Blame Hodgins' day? And anyway, I warned you guys! It's not my fault you didn't check your Facebook.

**Seeley Booth **I happen to have a life outside the internet, Hodgins. Besides, you're the only person on earth who feels the need to check Facebook every two seconds!

**Jack Hodgins **Hey!

**Daisy Wick **I do that too! ! :D :D

**Jack Hodgins **He said 'person' not 'freakshow'.

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **:O :O ! ! !

* * *

**Clark Edison**'s parents travelled a lot when he was younger.

**Clark Edison **Hey, maybe that's why I have abandonment issues!

**Clark Edison **... Hence my desire for professionalism!

**Jack Hodgins **Um... wow... O_O

**Camille Saroyan **Wow indeed. Someone's opening up...

(**Angela Montenegro **and **2 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **What a breakthrough! You go, Clark. :)

(**Clark Edison **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **Dude, don't encourage him!

(**Camille Saroyan **and **49 **friends like this)

* * *

**Clark Edison **to **Camille Saroyan**: So... are you still dating that gynaecologist? ;)

(**Paul Lidner **likes this)

**Camille Saroyan **Ahem! I have to... remove all this flesh from the victim. Now. Yes. Okay. Busy busy busy.

**Clark Edison **Okay! We can catch up later :)

(**4 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **... Who are you and what have you done with Clark? D:

* * *

**Lance Sweets **to **Seeley Booth**: Have you talked to Hannah yet?

**Seeley Booth **Do they have a course in hounding at shrink school, or what?

**Lance Sweets **I... cannot disclose that information.

**Seeley Booth ***facepalm*

* * *

**Lance Sweets **to **Seeley Booth**: Thanks to my intensive research of the victim, I've been able to draw some promising conclusions.

**Seeley Booth **You Facebook stalked her.

**Lance Sweets **Yes, that. Well, the victim's best and only friend de-friended her on Facebook four days ago, effectively severing their relationship. Pretty harsh.

**Seeley Booth **I dunno, maybe it was justified. We'll have to interrogate Ms Twist.

**Daisy Wick **You defriended me on Facebook once, Agent Booth! ! ! Were you trying to sever our relationship? ? ? :O :O

**Seeley Booth **...

**Daisy Wick **Agent Booth? ? ? :/

* * *

**Lance Sweets **to **Seeley Booth**: Okay, Booth. Once is enough. Please re-add Daisy, she's very upset.

**Seeley Booth **Nah.

**Lance Sweets **Seriously? She's, like, crying in my office right now... And as much as I love my girlfriend, she's making my current patient feel extremely awkward...

**Seeley Booth **Sorry, Sweets. I just don't see her as a friend, Facebook or otherwise.

**Lance Sweets **Hey, I think I might give Hannah a call. About Dr Brennan. ;)

**Seeley Booth **... I hate you.

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **and **Daisy Wick **are now friends.

(**Daisy Wick **and **Lance Sweets **like this)

**Daisy Wick ***sniffle* I'm glad you've seen the error of your ways, Agent Booth! ! !

**Seeley Booth **Whatever.

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **I feel like this experience has brought us closer together! ! ! Don't you? ? ? :D :D

**Seeley Booth **I'm getting too old for this...

* * *

**Lance Sweets **Revenge. For a handbag.

(**65 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **But what TYPE of handbag? ? ? :D :D

**Lance Sweets **... Does it matter?

**Camille Saroyan **Oh, it matters.

(**Angela Montenegro **and **11 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **Chanel?

**Angela Montenegro **Oh! Well, that makes sense.

(**Daisy Wick**, **Camille Saroyan **and **20 **friends like this)

**Lance Sweets **...

**Wendell Bray **... Girls are weird.

(**58 **friends like this)

* * *

**Angela Montenegro **to **Jack Hodgins**: Still hard at work? Bringing you over some lunch! :)

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **You're perfect.

**Angela Montenegro **But... I, uh, ate a bit of it.

**Angela Montenegro **Okay, most of it!

**Angela Montenegro **But it was for the baby! I swear.

**Jack Hodgins **Suuure ;) Thought that counts, I guess.

(**Angela Montenegro **likes this)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **to **Angela Montenegro**: Hey, found a piece of paper in the drain. Think you can reconstruct the writing on it?

**Angela Montenegro **Only if you let me eat the pudding I gave you for lunch.

**Angela Montenegro **Ahem, not for me. For the baby. The baby loves pudding. Ahem.

**Jack Hodgins **But - but - Angie, it's vanilla!

**Angela Montenegro **You would deprive your unborn child of pudding, Jack? Really?

**Jack Hodgins **Sigh... of course not.

(**Angela Montenegro **likes this)

**Angela Montenegro **Love you, Hodgie!

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **to **Hannah Burley**: Founding Fathers? Need to talk to you about something.

**Hannah Burley **I'm intrigued. Sure! Something important?

**Seeley Booth **Something that you need to know.

(**Lance Sweets **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **Go gloat somewhere else, Sweets.

**Lance Sweets **:(

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

* * *

**Hannah Burley **to **Seeley Booth**: Thanks for telling me. I'm seeing... you-know-who for lunch tomorrow, what should I say? :/

**Jack Hodgins **VOLDEMORT?

**Seeley Booth ***facepalm*

**Seeley Booth **Just, be gentle. That person... isn't like everyone else, you know that.

**Hannah Burley **I'd much rather just be shot again...

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **Amen to that. ;)

**Jack Hodgins **Seriously guys. Voldemort?

**Angela Montenegro ***repeated facepalm*

(**19 **friends like this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **to **Hannah Burley**: Hannah, I got us a lunch reservation for 2:30 pm.

**Hannah Burley **Oh! I'm sorry Temperance, I have to cancel. I'm too busy with my story about the Procreation Committee - sorry!

**Temperance Brennan **Of course, I understand. Why don't you call me when you have some free time?

**Hannah Burley** Will do! :)

**Daisy Wick **You turned down lunch with Dr Brennan? ! ? ! Are you crazy? ? I'll go to lunch with you, Dr Brennan! ! !

**Lance Sweets **But Daisy, *we* had lunch plans...

(**Jack Hodgins **and **27 **friends like this)

**Temperance Brennan **That will not be necessary, Miss Wick.

* * *

**Daisy Wick **to **Lance Sweets**: We're back on for lunch! ! !

**Lance Sweets **Thanks, Daisy. I feel appreciated.

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **You're welcome, baby! ! ! :D :D

**Lance Sweets ***facepalm*

* * *

**Angela Montenegro **to **Temperance Brennan**: Honey, three changes of plans between friends in one day is statistically impossible.

**Temperance Brennan** I'm afraid I... am unfamiliar with the study you are citing.

**Angela Montenegro **Little project I've conducted myself - at the Common Sense Institute.

**Temperance Brennan **Oh.

**Daisy Wick **Common Sense Institute? ? Is that what CSI stands for? ? ?

**Lance Sweets **O_O

**Jack Hodgins **Hah! Sucks to be you, my man. xD

(**3 **friends like this)

**Angela Montenegro **That... person is avoiding you, sweetie. She might be keeping something from you. Secrets are toxic between friends.

**Temperance Brennan **By 'person' are you still referring to Hannah?

**Angela Montenegro **So much for confidentiality...

(**Jack Hodgins **and **4 **friends like this)

* * *

**Clark Edison **to **Jack Hodgins**: Man! I've missed so much by not opening up around here!

**Clark Edison **BTW, congratulations, Dad. ;)

**Jack Hodgins **Uh... thanks...

(**Clark Edison **likes this)

**Clark Edison **I'm from a big family. I want lots of kids. You know, growing up, I could never get a word in... maybe that's why I'm so withdrawn!

**Clark Edison **Well, that or my stint in the NSA.

**Jack Hodgins **...

**Jack Hodgins **... Ahem, the NSA? Tell me more.

**Clark Edison **Nice try, Dr Hodgins. OOH! A fragment! Do you see that fragment in the hair?

**Jack Hodgins **Yes, Clark. I can see that.

**Clark Edison **Well, what are you waiting for? It could help ID our victim!

**Jack Hodgins **How about YOU try combing the hair? It's like the Gordian knot, or something.

**Camille Saroyan **Hey, geniuses. What gets knots out? Conditioner. Get off Facebook and start doing what I pay you for.

(**Angela Montenegro **likes this)

**Clark Edison **I want to start having babies. But my girlfriend's afraid of losing her sexuality during pregnancy...

**Nora Oldhouse **CLARK! O_O

**Camillie Saroyan **For the love of God, Clark, go buy the conditioner!

(**Jack Hodgins **and **71 **friends like this)

* * *

**Nora Oldhouse **to **Clark Edison**: Clark... Where did all this conditioner come from? You left five bottles in the shower, and you don't even have hair!

**Clark Edison **They're a present for you, baby. Left over from an experiment at work. :)

**Nora Oldhouse **... Experiment?

**Jack Hodgins **Yeah, we used it to untangle bone fragments from the victim's hair.

**Nora Oldhouse ***gags*

(**40 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **You two are more similar than I thought...

* * *

**Clark Edison **to **Jack Hodgins**: So, what's going on with Dr Brennan and Agent Booth and this... other woman?

(**108 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **Uh, we should work. Before Cam murders us.

(**Camille Saroyan **likes this)

**Clark Edison **But what if this all goes horribly wrong? The repercussions could be cataclysmic!

**Jack Hodgins **Be that as it may, Clark, nobody else wants to talk about this...

**Daisy Wick **I do! ! ! :D :D

**Wendell Bray **Yeah, I'm kind of interested, too. :)

**Colin Fisher **Even though nothing brings me joy in this soul-sucking world, I would like to catch up on the Booth/Brennan gossip.

**Arastoo Vaziri **Are you guys thinking what I'm thinking?

**Clark Edison **Move forward the bi-weekly Interns Meetup in the Founding Fathers to tonight?

(**Daisy Wick**, **Wendell Bray **and **3 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **YAY! ! ! :D :D

**Wendell Bray **I'm buying. ;)

**Jack Hodgins **You guys... meet up?

**Angela Montenegro **Twice a week?

**Arastoo Vaziri **That we do. :)

**Seeley Booth **But I thought you all hated each other's guts?

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **Actually, ladies and gents, we share a mutual respect for each other's abilities and the realm of forensic anthropology. We meet up twice a week to discuss our work colleagues. Fact.

(**6 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **Yeah, we talk about how annoying you guys are! ! ! :D :D :D

**Camille Saroyan **O_O

**Jack Hodgins **... I don't know how to process this.

(**Camille Saroyan **and **Seeley Booth **like this)

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **to **Hannah Burley**: You have succeeded your statistical quota of legitimate excuses for the day. I demand to know why you are ignoring me.

**Hannah Burley **Temperance, I'm in a meeting with the President right now...

**Temperance Brennan **I don't want to lose you as a friend, Hannah. I insist that you tell me now.

**Hannah Burley **... Seeley told me about the conversation you two had.

**Temperance Brennan **He shouldn't have done that.

**Hannah Burley **He had to.

**Jack Hodgins **AWKWARD.

(**12 **friends like this)

**Camille Saroyan **Oh my God, Hodgins, do you make it your mission to ruin EVERYONE'S relationships?

(**81 **friends like this)

**Jack Hodgins **Yes.

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Hannah Burley **... Anyway, I wasn't avoiding you, I was just confused. I don't want to ruin your friendship with Seeley, or my friendship with you.

(**Temperance Brennan **likes this)

**Hannah Burley **Um, anyway, I actually am in a meeting right now, and I don't think the president is enjoying being ignored.

**Temperance Brennan **Oh! I am sorry. Could you please ask him to devote more resources to the conflict in Congo?

**Hannah Burley **Sure thing. See you for drinks later - I won't cancel! :)

(**Temperance Brennan **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **Can you tell him I say hi? :D

**Jack Hodgins **... Hannah?

**Jack Hodgins **Ugh. Never mind.

(**Camille Saroyan **likes this)

* * *

**Lance Sweets **posted a **photo**.

**Lance Sweets **to **Seeley Booth**: Here you go. Page 237 from the victim's web history.

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **Thanks Sweets.

**Seeley Booth **... Wait, why is she holding a rat?

**Lance Sweets **Chinchilla.

**Seeley Booth **Chile con carne to you too. Send the rest of the stuff over?

**Lance Sweets **Sure thing. Could take a while - I have 600 pages of this stuff.

**Jack Hodgins** ... Dude, that's Facebook stalking to the extreme. O_O

**Wendell Bray **Yeah, I'm kinda freaked out now...

**Angela Montenegro **Uh huh.

**Clark Edison **I'm all for exploring my personal side, but that's just scary.

(**38 **friends like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **to **Camille Saroyan**: Sweets won't pick up his cell, what gives?

**Camille Saroyan **Oh, everyone at the Jeffersonian de-friended him on Facebook after the whole victim-stalking thing. I think he's sulking.

**Seeley Booth **Wait, everyone?

**Camille Saroyan **Except for Brennan. But I'm not sure if she knows how to de-friend someone in the first place...

(**Angela Montenegro **and **66 **friends like this)

**Seeley Booth **Fair point.

**Camille Saroyan **Maybe you should go check on him - even Daisy deleted him.

**Seeley Booth **Wait, DAISY deleted him? Ms I-have-no-respect-for-personal-boundaries?

**Daisy Wick **Safety first! ! ! :D :D

**Seeley Booth ***facepalm* I'll go see him. He better not be crying...

(**Camille Saroyan **and **11 **friends like this)

* * *

**Camille Saroyan **to **Clark Edison**: If you ever feel the need to bottle yourself up again... We'll support you.

(**Angela Montenegro**, **Jack Hodgins **and **3 **friends like this)

**Clark Edison **Uh... Thanks! :)

**Jack Hodgins **HINT, HINT.

**Angela Montenegro ***facepalm*

(**16 **friends like this)

* * *

**Seeley Booth **Well, whaddaya know. Tracked the victim down through her pet rat.

**Lance Sweets **Chinchilla.

**Seeley Booth **Chinchilla, enchilada, same thing.

**Lance Sweets **What? No, it's not...

**Daisy Wick **Booth! ! De-friend Lancelot! ! ! He'll stalk you! ! D: D:

**Daisy Wick **Love you, baby! :D :D x3

**Lance Sweets **...

(**Seeley Booth **and **72 **friends like this)

* * *

**Clark Edison **Death by shower? That's a new one.

(**45 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **Showers can kill you now? ? :O :O

**Arastoo Vaziri** Wait, seriously? Because I just had a shower... D:

**Vincent Nigel-Murray **Perhaps it would interest you to know that 100% of people who use shampoo die.

(**Angela Montenegro **and **99 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **WHAT? ? ? D: D:

**Wendell Bray **Seriously?

**Colin Fisher **I always knew shampoo would be the cause of my unhappiness.

**Seeley Booth **... For nerds, you guys are all idiots.

(**112 **friends like this)

* * *

**Lance Sweets **to **Seeley Booth**: So, did everything work out okay with you and Hannah?

**Seeley Booth **Yeah, she's just amazing. Wow.

**Lance Sweets **And you don't feel threatened by her close friendship with Dr Brennan?

**Seeley Booth **Of course not. Why should I?

**Lance Sweets **Uh, no reason?

(**Seeley Booth **likes this)

**Seeley Booth **Good. Conversation over.

**Lance Sweets **Uh, actually, could I just ask you a favour?

**Seeley Booth **No, Sweets. I am in the middle of a murder investigation, I do not have the time to convince everyone to re-add you on Facebook.

**Lance Sweets **But -

**Seeley Booth **Not happening.

**Lance Sweets **:(

* * *

**Seeley Booth **to **Lance Sweets**: Got the footage from the bedroom's teddy bear cam set up, need you to come see it.

**Lance Sweets **On my way.

**Lance Sweets **... Is this work, or porn? :/

(**4 **friends like this)

**Seeley Booth **There's... an overlap.

**Hannah Burley **Porn, Seeley? At work?

(**Angela Montenegro **and **Camille Saroyan **like this)

**Seeley Booth **Oh, hey Hannah, I - um - thought you were still at your meeting...

**Daisy Wick **PORN? ? ? ? D: D: D:

**Lance Sweets **Oh crap.

(**Seeley Booth **and **59 **friends like this)

* * *

**Lance Sweets **is now friends with **Daisy Wick**.

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Lance Sweets **I think I'd feel happier about this if you weren't just adding me to spy on me and make sure I stop watching porn...

**Daisy Wick **Love you, Lancelot! ! ! x3 x3

**Lance Sweets **Sigh...

* * *

**Angela Montenegro **to **Jack Hodgins**: Everyone's gone home. Are you thinking what I'm thinking? ;)

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **Look at the baby with the sonogram again? :D

**Angela Montenegro **You bet. I'm in my office :)

(**Clark Edison **likes this)

**Clark Edison **Wow! Wow, you guys that is amazing. :D

**Jack Hodgins **Uh... Thanks, Clark.

**Clark Edison **Seriously. I think this calls for a group hug! *hugs*

**Angela Montenegro **Aw, that's sweet. *hug*

**Jack Hodgins **... But it's mostly just weird.

**Clark Edison **...? :(

**Angela Montenegro **Oh, just hug him, Jack.

**Jack Hodgins **Ugh. Fine. *hug*

(**Clark Edison **likes this)

**Clark Edison **Great job on the case, guys. Have a good night! :D

**Jack Hodgins **... I'm pretty sure you've eaten the real Clark.

**Angela Montenegro **Jack, be nice!

**Jack Hodgins ***whispers* But Angie! He was in the NSA - he could totally be messing with us!

**Clark Edison **Just because you type '*whispers*' online doesn't mean I can't see what you wrote, Dr Hodgins.

(**84 **friends like this)

**Angela Montenegro ***facepalm*

(**15 **friends like this)

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **to **Angela Montenegro**: You still want Paisley's place? ;)

**Jack Hodgins **I'll fix the shower, I promise.

**Angela Montenegro **Hodgins, this is the craziest, most romantic thing anyone's ever done for me.

**Angela Montenegro **I love you.

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Jack Hodgins **I love you more. xD

**Clark Edison **:D :D :D

**Jack Hodgins **... Okay, seriously Clark, now you're just acting like Daisy.

(**Daisy Wick **likes this)

**Daisy Wick **:D :D :D ! ! !

* * *

**Temperance Brennan **has a very high tolerance for alcohol.

(**79 **friends like that)

**Hannah Burley **Is that a challenge? :P

**Lance Sweets **Don't rise to the challenge, Hannah. I'm pretty sure I got alcohol poisoning when I last joined Dr Brennan for a drink.

(**Temperance Brennan**, **Jack Hodgins **and **40 **friends like this)

**Seeley Booth **He's not kidding. I had to carry him home.

(**Daisy Wick **and **91 **friends like this)

* * *

**Hannah Burley **to **Temperance Brennan**: Can you believe the guy at the bar? Creep!

**Seeley Booth **Wait, what guy?

**Temperance Brennan **A moderately attractive man insinuated that having a threesome with myself and Hannah tonight was a possibility. Incorrectly, I might add.

(**124 **friends like this)

**Seeley Booth **WHAT?

**Hannah Burley **Like I said, creep.

**Seeley Booth **What did he look like? Is he still at the bar? I'm bringing my gun.

**Angela Montenegro **This isn't going to end well...

**Jack Hodgins **To the nuclear war shelter?

**Camille Saroyan **You don't have to ask me twice.

**Lance Sweets **Amen to that.

**Daisy Wick **Can I come too? ? ? :D :D

**Jack Hodgins **...

* * *

**Jack Hodgins **The awkward moment when **Daisy Wick **feels wanted...

(**6****5 **friends like this)

**Daisy Wick **Hey! ! D: D:

**Jack Hodgins **It's funny, 'cause it's true ;)

(**Jack Hodgins **likes this)

**Angela Montenegro **Oh, God. Maybe we should go for drinks after all... *facepalm*

**Camille Saroyan **I'll join you. *rolls eyes*

**Daisy Wick **Wait, can I come? ?

**Camille Saroyan **...

**Angela Montenegro **...

**Camille Saroyan **... Awkward.

(**20 **friends like this)

* * *

**A/N: Hardly a masterpiece, but I hope you liked it anyway! Please do leave me a review, they brighten up my day :D  
Happy Easter!**

**Peace,  
-Ellie :D **


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